Relationships
Recreational Intimacy Is The Outdoorsy Way To Get Closer With Your Partner
Learn to appreciate nature and one another.
When it comes to relationships, there’s always room for improving intimacy. From six-second kisses and breath synchronization to non-physical bonding exercises like sharing music and reading out loud, there are so many things you can do to keep the spark alive. But if you and your partner are both active people, recreational intimacy might just be the hack for you.
Though we often put an emphasis on physical or emotional intimacy, you might be surprised to learn there are actually 12 different types of intimacy, and recreational is one of them. According to Alan Rutherford, a licensed professional counselor, recreational intimacy can be achieved by finding hobbies you and your other half can bond over. Not only is recreational intimacy supposed to be fun, but the shared experiences will help take your relationship out of the house and create lasting memories. The best part is recreational intimacy can look like so many different things, including riding bikes, taking a workout class, and even taking a stroll through the neighborhood.
As relationship therapist Spirit once explained on The Mel Robbins Show, having a partner who shares the same interest in activities as you is a must to achieve a high level of recreational compatibility, which the expert considers to be one of the five ingredients to fostering intimacy within a relationship. If neither you nor your partner has an interest in recreational activities, then this doesn’t apply to you. But if your love of the great outdoors keeps you hiking, biking, and rock climbing all weekend long while your significant other sits at home, then you might not be the best match for one another.
If you’re looking to integrate recreational intimacy into your love life, Rutherford has some suggestions. First, you and your partner should write down examples of all the times you’ve experienced recreational intimacy in your relationship. If you can’t think of any, the expert recommends proposing a new way to introduce the concept into your relationship. Compare your responses, discuss how past experiences did or did not work for you, and soon you’ll be planning new adventures in no time.
There’s no one right way to build recreational intimacy — as long as you’re each engaging in an activity you both have a shared interest in, you’re doing it right. In order to maintain your sense of self, though, it’s important to have other interests outside of your relationship as well. So instead of inviting your beau on your weekly hot girl walk with your besties, try finding another activity you can bond over together instead.