Titties, boobies, tatas, melons; there are as many nicknames for breasts as there are Eskimo words for snow. Whatever you choose to call them, fun pillows have been celebrated, worshipped, and adored since the dawn of time. But how much do you really know about your boobs? If you’re like me, chances are you know next to nothing. But that’s no reason to wallow in ignorance because you don't know your basic boob facts. You've probably wondered things like, are my boobs normal?, what's up with that stray hair?, or why is one bigger than the other? at some point in your life, and now it's time to get the facts straight.
These puppies are a (wonderful) part of you so it only stands to reason that you learn a little something about these oversized sweat glands sitting on your chest. Next time you’re at the zoo check out a chimp or a gorilla (a female one of course). See how her boobs are flat as a pancake? That’s because her breasts are only inflated when she is feeding her young. From how many different types of nipples exist (yes, you're reading that right) to who's actually staring at your chest, here's what you gotta know about your boobs. After all, they're kinda the best part of your body.
1. We are the only primates with “permanent” boobs.
Next time you’re at the zoo check out a chimp or a gorilla (a female one of course). See how her boobs are flat as a pancake? That’s because her breasts are only inflated when she is feeding her young. Not the case for us homo sapiens who have “swollen” boobs 24/7. Personally I think it’s a plot by lingerie stores to get us to buy more bras, but technically the reasons for such permanent boobage is unknown.
2. Some women can achieve orgasm through their breasts
This may seem as believable as the abominable Snowman, but yes it’s true. Some women can indeed reach the big “O” from nipple stimulation. As reported by Men’s Health, 29% of women reported experiencing a boob orgasm at some point. So start groping those titties ladies! Or get you BF/GF/FWB to do it.
3. The leftie is bigger than the rightie.
No two sets of boobs are perfectly symmetrical, but according to the wonderful world of science your left boob is statistically likely to be bigger. That is if you can believe a study by the Annals of Plastic Surgery. Personally I think my twinsies are exactly the same size. Like two perfect cantaloupes.
4. Almost all boobs have stray hairs.
I know nobody wants to think about this, but most boobs have a stray hair or two hiding out like an alley cat. Anywhere from 2-15 hairs is very common and the darker your hair, the more hair you’ll likely have. Ah the curse of being a brunette.
5. Women stare at your chest too.
So much for men being the only pervs. Girls you are just as pervy when it comes to staring at boobs! Perhaps women are just checking out the competition or perhaps we have a little boob envy ourselves. I’ll cop to it; I’ve totally been known to check out a rack or two. Either way, let’s not forget the eyes are on the face ladies!
6. There are 8 different kinds of nipples.
Bet you didn’t see this one coming. A nipple is a nipple, right? Or so you thought. Turns out nipples are like the flavors at Doughnut Plant; they’re all different. Writer Tracie Egan Morrissey from Jezebel unearthed this shocking discovery when she pushed out a baby and realized her flat nips might have problems breast feeding.
7. Your boobs get fatter with age.
When you’re younger, your tatas are made up of not just fat but milk glands and collagen which keeps them firm and pert; like two sexy mountains. However as you age, the glands and collagen dwindle and get replaced by fat. While this can make your boobs bigger, it can also make them sag National Geographic-style. So if you don’t want your cans on the floor, slap on an underwire bra and train those girls to stand up straight.
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