Relationships
Get To Know Your Loved Ones Better With These 65 Deep Questions
There’s always more you can learn about each other.
Have you ever wondered when your SO first realized they wanted to be in a relationship with you? Or wanted to know what your BFF’s first impression of you was? Have you ever thought about what your parents were like as teenagers before you came into the picture? (Same!) Communication is the source of all forms of intimacy, so what better way to get to know someone well than to ask good truth questions?
“Intimacy is all about being known, and one of the main ways we reveal ourselves is through what we share with others,” says friendship coach and host of the “Friend Forward” podcast Danielle Bayard Jackson. “Communication is important for creating a shared understanding and getting towards the goal of being seen and known.”
Asking good truth questions can help you discover everything from what the other person is most passionate about to what life events were most transformative for them. “Asking something like, ‘If money was no object, what would you do? How would you spend your time?’ for example, is very revealing of what they’re passionate about, what they value, what they prioritize, and what lights them up,” says Bayard Jackson.
While true intimacy and closeness takes time and should not be attempted to be rushed through a series of interview-style questions, there are some tried and true Qs you can ask to get to know that special someone (or someones) a little bit better. Bustle has compiled 65 good truth questions for couples, friends, and family members to deepen those bonds most important to you.
Good Truth Questions For Couples
- Other than me, who in your life knows you the best?
- Do you want kids, and if so, what values do you want to instill in them that your parents instilled in you?
- What’s something we haven’t done that you want to experience together?
- How do you foresee us resolving conflicts that may arise in the future?
- What’s something you want to learn about me that you feel like you don’t already know?
- What are your short-term and long-term goals for this relationship?
- What’s something you want to achieve, either individually or collectively, that I can help you with?
- Have you ever wanted to live somewhere else? If so, where?
- What’s your favorite memory of our relationship?
- What’s your favorite thing about me?
- When you’re feeling low, do you prefer to take time for yourself or talk through your feelings with someone else?
- How do you remember our first date?
- How did our first kiss make you feel?
- What’s been your favorite date we’ve had?
- What was your first sexual experience like?
- Who was your first love?
- When was your first heartbreak?
- When did you realize you wanted to be in a relationship with me?
- What makes you feel the most secure in our relationship?
- What makes you feel most loved?
- What song makes you think about me?
- What personal experiences or situations have inspired your philosophy of love?
Good Truth Questions for Friends
- If money was no object, what would you do? How would you spend your time?
- What’s a hidden talent very few people know about you?
- What’s a misconception you believe people often have about you?
- What was your very first impression of me?
- What do you appreciate most about our friendship?
- What were you like in high school?
- What’s an album you could listen to on repeat and never get tired of?
- If you could rename yourself, what would you change your name to?
- Do you have any recurring dreams? Tell me about them!
- If you had $1 million to donate to a cause of your choosing, what cause would you donate that money to?
- What’s something that keeps you up at night?
- What’s a recent win you’ve had that we can celebrate together?
- What’s a saying or motto you live by?
- When you’ve had a bad day, what do you do to cheer yourself up?
- What’s the last book you read and what was it about?
- What’s the last movie you saw, and would you recommend it?
- What’s the scariest experience you’ve ever had to go through?
- What’s a city you haven’t traveled to yet that you’ve always wanted to visit?
- What does an ideal Friday night look like for you?
- Have you ever lied for a friend or asked a friend to lie for you? What were the circumstances around that decision?
- What’s a secret only your closest friends know about you?
- In what areas of our friendship could I show up for you more?
Good Truth Questions for Family Members
- What’s the most significant experience that has shaped your life so far?
- What’s the biggest difference you see between my generation and yours?
- What’s your fondest childhood memory?
- What are some old family traditions that you’d like to bring back?
- Do you see any similarities between you and me when you were my age?
- When you were a teenager, what would you often get in trouble for?
- What were your parents like growing up?
- What’s your favorite thing about our relationship?
- What’s been the most rewarding part of being a parent?
- What do you find most challenging about being a parent?
- What’s the best concert you’ve ever been to that you wish you could experience all over again?
- What did you look like when you were younger? Show me a picture!
- What’s something you know now that you wish you knew earlier in life?
- What’s your biggest hope for my future? What’s your fear?
- Did you ever hide things from your parents?
- What’s the worst job you’ve ever had?
- What did you want to be when you grew up?
- What was your favorite book or cartoon when you were younger?
- When I was a teenager, what were the things I did that most upset you?
- What are your earliest memories of me?
- How did grandma and grandpa meet?