The KFC Double Down changed lives and cholesterol levels when it debuted in 2010, introducing the world to the dubious magic beheld by inhaling bacon, cheese, and sauce sandwiched between two fried chicken patties. Though it was only intended to be a temporary menu item, perhaps in hopes of sparing all the animals that had to die to give it to us, the Double Down has persevered, and now they're gifting us with a KFC Waffle Double Down, which seems like heaven. Tragically, though, it's only coming to Canada. WE CAN'T HAVE ANYTHING NICE.
KFC Canada announced on Twitter that it is officially dropping the KFC Waffle Double Down on March 26, and it sounds like it'll be the glorious, decadent treat I've only envisioned in my night terrors. Like the OG Double Down, this waffle iteration has swapped out the classic bun in favor of two fried chicken patties, but instead of hugging sauce and bacon, the patties are sandwiched around a Belgian waffle soaked in a maple syrup aioli.
"The Double Down is our most talked about and demanded menu item in Canada, so we wanted to do something special exclusively for Canadian fans," Samantha Redman, KFC Canada's chief marketing officer, said in a press release. "We know fans have been craving chicken and waffles on our menu, and we're happy to provide this unique take on the trendy food pairing. The maple aioli sauce is a sweet nod to KFC's Canadian fans." O, CANADA. My god, it looks so good:
Because the classic Double Down is so quintessentially American — bacon, fried chicken, unnecessary excess — it appears Canada wanted to make the Double Down its own thing, hence the very Canadian addition of maple syrup. Then again, the KFC Waffle Double Down is also a callback to fried chicken and waffles, which is an absolutely American dish, having allegedly been created sometime after Thomas Jefferson brought a waffle iron from France to the United States post-American Revolution. I do not know when Canada got its first waffle, although considering a solid chunk of it was settled by the French way back when, it is possible they got waffles before we did. BUT STILL.
Personally, I don't care for bacon, so I am vaguely insulted that the Waffle Double Down isn't deemed American enough for me to get without hopping a border, and also that we as a nation have not bothered to invent even better Double Down iterations, considering we have such diverse and wide-ranging cuisine here. For instance, as a New Yorker, I would eat the heck out of a KFC Bagel Double Down, complete with smoked salmon and capers. I'd also quite enjoy a Spaghetti Double Down, because spaghetti goes with everything, and as chicken parms (an American invention, nonetheless!) have proven time and time again, fried chicken also goes with everything.
Another good invention could be a KFC Pizza Double Down — a slice of pizza could really wedge in between those chicken cutlets like nobody's business. I would also accept a KFC Ice Cream Sundae Double Down, because like waffles and maple syrup, the sweet taste of ice cream and chocolate fudge would pair expertly with the saltier fried chicken. You could also stick a burger between the fried chicken, if we're doing more meat on meat — other Very American iterations include the KFC Hot Dog Double Down, the KFC French Fry Double Down, the KFC Mac 'n Cheese Double Down, the KFC Tex Mex Taco Double Down, and the KFC Avocado Toast Double Down, which will surely bankrupt the millennial generation.
Anyway, train tickets to Montreal are only like a hundred bucks from New York, which seems a small price to pay for a mouth lifetime of happiness.
