If you're currently feeling smug about staying on top of the holiday grind this year, then you may want to take a backseat, because Oreo just outdid all of us and then some. Just last month the beloved cookie rocked our candy cane trash hearts with the release of the Peppermint Bark Oreo; now, rounding out the holiday season, we are getting Dark Chocolate-flavored Oreos that sound so delicious that somewhere Cookie Monster just blacked out and doesn't know why.
Per Oreo, the flavor is meant to help us ~embrace the darkness~ of the long winter months. And truly, given the description of it, I can think of no better way of leaning into said darkness: the new cookie features "Dark Chocolate flavored creme sandwiched between two classic OREO chocolate wafers," according to Oreo. Although they are being launched around the darkest time of the year — they'll be available Jan. 2 in retailers nationwide — unlike Oreo's Peppermint Bark addition, the Dark Chocolate Oreos will be a permanent flavor on the Oreo lineup. As a Hufflepuff, I never thought I'd be saying this, but bring on the darkness, y'all.
Here's what the boxes will look like, so you can prime yourself to zero in on them once they hit shelves.
It's been a delicious season to be a fan of Oreos, if you've been paying attention to all the Oreo-related news that's been coming in; a lot of fast food chains pride themselves on their Oreo-related desserts, and in 2018 they have all kept their legacies strong. There is, of course, the Oreo Hot Cocoa Blizzard, which returned to Dairy Queen as the Blizzard of the Month in November. Cold Stone Creamery also just announced two new signature flavors for winter, one of which is a Dark Chocolate Peppermint Ice Cream featuring Ghirardelli Peppermint Pieces, Oreo cookie crumbles, and whipped cream. And true fans recently took note of the existence of an Oreo Drink Mix on shelves, which allows you to go full Oreo-ception by dunking your Oreos ... into Oreos. I assume that once you do this you finally reach whatever the final Pokemon evolution is for a '90s kid, since I can't really imagine a greatness that goes beyond it.
If you're an Oreo stan and also have Oreo lovers in your life, there's good news and bad news — the bad news is that the Dark Chocolate-flavored Oreos won't be hitting shelves in time for gift-giving season, so you won't be able to shove a box of them into anyone's oversized stocking. The good news is that, in the interim, you can prepare them for the new flavor by gifting them the Oreo Dunking Set at Walmart.
This particular gift may be a tad self-serving, since it comes with two mugs (and the other is obviously for you), but we all need a dunking buddy to make sure we dunk responsibly. And considering what's at stake with these Dark Chocolate-flavored Oreos on the horizon, you're going to need all of the dunking practice you can get.
