If you're single on New Year's Eve, there's no reason to stress about who to kiss at midnight. Not only are New Year's kisses totally overhyped, but New Year's is a great time to get focused on all of the great things that come with being single. It's time we get over the stigma around single women and start embracing it for just how amazing it can be — and the start of the 2018 is the perfect time to do just that.
In fact, for some people, being single is a better fit than being in a relationship. "There are certainly temperaments that are better suited to being alone — some people are more solitary by nature, and may enjoy companionship from time to time, but actually prefer the rhythms of being single," Dr. Ramani Durvasula, author of Should I Stay or Should I Go: Surviving a Relationship With A Narcissist, tells Bustle. For some women, it just works. And even if you're normally a relationship person, or are single but looking, there's no reason to not embrace the times that you are single while you can.
In 2017, science confirmed that women actually enjoy being single more than men do, which means that 2018 is the time to own it. If you're having trouble seeing the benefits to being single, here's a reminder of why being single in 2018 will be flipping amazing.
1Because There's Way More To Your Life Than Your Relationship Status
Sometimes when you're feeling bummed abut being single, it's hard to gain perspective, but you are not defined by your relationship status, regardless of how rom-coms can make you feel. Take a moment to think about all the good things in your life, whether it's your friends, your career, your dog, the fact you finally saved some money this year, or your upcoming travels.
"As a single woman, you should remind yourself that you have an amazing life," dating expert Noah Van Hochman tells Bustle. "Let your confidence in your own life exude into everything around you... Happiness and confidence attracts the same." So remember that — independence and autonomy should never be underestimated.
2Because Women Aren't Taking Any BS
The #MeToo movement this year showed that women are fed up with being treated badly. That should be true beyond no longer tolerating sexual harassment and abuse in silence, and include refusing to be in toxic relationships. "I'd rather be single, in a comfortable relationship with myself, than trapped in a dysfunctional, toxic relationship with someone else," certified relationship coach Rosalind Sedacca tells Bustle. "Being single gives me freedom so I don't waste time or energy on a relationship partner who doesn't value me and my attributes. I've given up drama and appreciate my life as it is now."
You should never put up with it, especially when being single is such a better option.
3Because Single People Are Fulfilled AF
Our culture is finally starting to let go of the myth that single people are lonely, unhappy, or unfulfilled. In fact, research that spanned hundreds of studies found that single people can be more fulfilled than their coupled-up counterparts.
"Americans are convinced that getting married makes people happier, healthier, more connected to other people and better off in all sorts of other emotional and interpersonal ways. They believe that science shows those things," Dr. Bella DePaulo, the study author who looked at 814 studies, tells Bustle. "...most of those claims are grossly exaggerated or just plain false! For example, studies that follow people over time find that when people get married, they end up no happier than they were when they were single. At best, they get a brief increase in happiness around the time of the wedding, but then they go back to being about as happy or as unhappy as they were when they were single."
So remember, when you're looking through all of those coupled-up photos of Instagram, it doesn't mean you're any less fulfilled.
4Because Your Sex Life Can Still Be Amazing
Don't worry about what flying solo means for your sex life — it's still a whole lot of fun to get off and find out more about your body. New sex toys are coming out all the time, with new innovations and technologies being developed. We have high-tech vibrators, we have suction-based tools like the Womanizer Plus, and we have the Ora 2 that mimics oral sex perfectly. Your sex life can still be off the hook when you're on your own.
5Because You Can Save So Much Money
It's so much easier to get your finances in order when you're single. "While couples can split many costs, that doesn't put single women at a disadvantage. In fact, being single can be a huge advantage,” account Michael Eckstein tells Bustle. “When you're single, you never have to clear ideas with a second person and you never have to compromise. This makes decisions a lot simpler and allows for extra savings opportunities.” You're the only person you need to consider when it comes to your finances, so make the most of it.
6Because You Can Use That Money To Treat Yourself
Having more money doesn't just mean saving — if you don't want it to — it can also mean treating yourself once in a while, just because.
7Because It's Always A Good Time To Explore Sexually
Sexual exploration is a great part of being single, whether that's a one-night stand, a few hookups here and there, or sex with a regular partner. As long as it's something both parties want to do and you're staying safe, sex for sex's sake can be just what the doctor ordered.
8Because It's A Good Time For A Solo Trip
When you're single, you have so much more flexibility with your time. “You can go and have any experience you want, whenever you want, and not have to worry about what someone else wants,” psychologist Dr. Nikki Martinez tells Bustle. “This is the time to travel on your own, to take a class just for fun, to do as many activities that you want, as you will not always have the chance to just pick up and do what you feel like. It is not that a partner holds you back, it is that in good relationships, you make decisions as a couple.” And sometimes it's nice just to what you want, when you want.
9Because You Can Finally Learn To Put Yourself First
“I think being single is an exercise that every person should go through at some point in their adult life," Martinez says. "It is a time that gives us the distance and clarity that we need to get to know who we truly are as a person, and to firmly define what it is that we want in a future partner." Or maybe you'll realize you just want to stay single — that's OK, too.
Being single can be an amazing, fulfilling experience. So in 2018, make sure you embrace it as much as it deserves. It's your year.
