7 Disagreements That Are OK 6 Months Into A Relationship, But Not A Year In

When a couple is only six months in, it's likely no big deal if they can't yet agree on what their future might entail. You don't have to know the answer yet at that point. By a year, however, these questions can take on a more serious tone.

"If you still can't agree on the future of the relationship after a year (marriage? kids? open?) then I would be concerned where it is heading," Bennett says. "This is a key area that should be sorted out by a year." If you're still struggling with this issue a year in, you may want to consider counseling or another strategy to resolve the conflict.

Couples don't need to have the same needs — but you and your partner should be able to ask for what you want and deliver on it when you've been together for a year. Six months in, however, couples may still be figuring things out like how much alone time the two of you need.

"Usually after a year couples have worked out issues of alone time and personal space," Bennett. "If you're still upset that they are too needy, or not needy enough, after a year, it may just be you aren't going to be on the same page on this issue." This issue is worth really paying attention to if it means the difference between having a partner who treats you the way you want, versus having one who doesn't.

Cheating, despite the cut-and-dry way it's so often talked about, is actually a nuanced issue. Different people tend to have different ideas about what constitutes cheating. If you and your partner are still trying to come to an understanding, that's OK. At a year, it may not be.

"After a year you should have boundaries established to know what is considered cheating and what isn't," Bennett says. "If your partner still thinks emotional cheating is fine, but it drives you crazy every time it happens, then after a year, you're likely not simply establishing boundaries; you likely have different ones." You may decide not to continue in the relationship if you two have two completely different perspectives on this.

Since you're still finding out a lot about each other when you're only six months in, it may be less of a big deal to uncover "secrets" about one another. You may still disagree, but these disagreements will likely take on a much less serious tone before your first anniversary.

"One argument that is OK six months into a relationship but not one year is [is] fighting about your partner's secrets," licensed marriage and family therapist Katie Ziskind, tells Bustle. If you two cannot be open with each other a year in, you may have more serious issues to address either together, or with the help of a relationship professional.

Sometimes, the issue with a couple's disagreement has less to do with the disagreement itself, and more to do with how often it occurs. If you've had the same argument a couple times six months in, that may not be a red flag, but if that same argument persists for a year, you may have a deeper issue in the relationship.

"Another sign of trouble is if couples are having a similar argument over and over again and feeling worse after talking about it," Bowen says. "In this situation they are likely to get more frustrated over time so the argument will feel worse as time progresses." Couples counseling may help you learn to communicate more effectively, and perhaps get to the root cause of your disagreement.

Among other things you may still be figuring out, defining the relationship is still perfectly natural around six months in. Maybe you've already decided to be a couple, but there are a lot of different factors that define what that entails. By a year, however, this conversation could be happening a bit too late.

"A sign of trouble would be if at 12 months couples are still fighting regarding type of relationship (monogamous, open, etc), fidelity (if in a monogamous relationship), availability of their partner, accessibility to their partner," Bowen says. "At six months some relationships may still be being defined so disagreements at this stage around defining the relationship are more common." If you and your partner cannot agree on the terms of a relationship by a year, then perhaps it is not the right relationship for you.

When you're only six months into a relationship, it makes sense that the topic of money is only just being discussed. This difficult conversation may lead to some disagreements. If, however, it's still causing a lot of conflict a year in, that may be a more serious issue.

"I think that in the first six months or so you're seeing how you and your partner view money, and spending it or saving it," Bennett says. "If you're still having this argument after a year, it's very possible you just have extremely different views of what to do with your money." You may want to take into account how these differing views will affect your relationship in the long-run.

While there are no cut-and-dry rules for what arguments make or break a relationship, there is definitely a different context for certain arguments when a couple is six months versus a year into a relationship. You and your partner can decide how you want to address more serious conflict, but it's important to be aware of what disagreements may spell trouble in your future.