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Madeline may have some of the best one-liners in Monterey, but she's far from the only quotable matriarch on Big Little Lies. In fact, in the second season of Big Little Lies, it's Renata's quotes that have really stolen the show. If screaming "Will somebody give a woman a moment?" while sticking a middle finger out of her sun roof on the highway isn't enough to win Laura Dern an Emmy, what is?
In Season 1, Renata was an antagonist to the other women. She took protecting her daughter Amabella to the extreme, and was out to get Madeline and Jane at every turn. But after being bonded together with the rest of the Monterey Five by Perry's death, she's on their side this time around, which means all of her anger has been directed at the men — and Mary Louise. It makes all of her caustic comebacks even more delightful, since, you know, those on the receiving end actually deserve them. Calling the principle a "puss f*ck" may have been a smidge over the line, but damn if it wasn't satisfying to watch.
With the Season 2 finale just around the corner, let's look back at Renata's best (and most biting) quotes.
"I said thank you!"
If this Season 1, Episode 2 moment marked the instant you became obsessed with Renata, raise your hand.
"I just thought it was nice for the nannies to get to know one another."
In Big Little Lies' very first episode, Renata thought Jane was Ziggy's nanny instead of his mom. Welcome to Monterey, Jane.
"You never let a bully win. Do you hear me? You have to speak up, Amabella. You have to be a big girl and use your voice in this world. That's why they call me a bulldog because I had to learn how to fight back with a bully."
This isn't quippy, it's just a good quote, and really makes you feel for Renata even though she's been going after Jane and Madeline. How scared would you be if you saw signs that your daughter was being bit and choked at school?
"Have I become tragically un-fun?"
If planning elaborate children's birthday parties makes you fun, Renata is safe.
"If I can offer something as objectively as I possibly can? Do not f*ck with my daughter's birthday."
If only the Monterey Five's biggest concern was still pettily bickering over kids' parties.
"What are you gonna do, huh? Choke me?"
When it comes to comebacks, Renata always goes for the jugular.
"You're dead in this town, as is your f*cking puppet show."
Remember when Madeline's biggest problem was trying to put on a community theatre production of Avenue Q?
"I'll even get Snow White to sit on your husband's face."
This Season 1 birthday pary was such a thing.
"I'm tired of these shots of women. I mean they're in power, right? They own banks and they're all like demure. Bullsh*t."
This was more about the photoshoot than anything Renata actually said, but we'd be remiss not to include it.
"I will not not be rich."
This one's really all about the delivery. Reading the quote does not do it justice.
“I used to like to sit on your face, too. You think that'll happen again?"
After Gordon points out Renata used to like "What Becomes of the Brokenhearted" by Jimmy Ruffin, which is playing on the radio, she replies with the comeback to end all comebacks.
"Will somebody give a woman a moment?!"
Yelling Renata is always the Best Renata.
"You deconstructed my little girl into a coma."
It's important for the Big Little Lies parents to realize that their drama actually does affect their children's stress levels... but who could have guessed that Amabella's panic attack would be triggered by climate change? Same, girl.
"I will be rich again. I will rise up. I will buy a f*cking polar bear for every kid in this school."
Only Renata would measure wealth in polar bears.
"I'm never cool. But I will try my best for you. For you I'm about to be cool for the first time in my life."
Did anyone else kind of cringe at how relatable Renata's manic attempt to host a party and be charming while everything falls apart is? She just gave away her dress!
"It's my picker that's broken."
The way Renata and Gordon's marriage is crumbling is hard to watch. She regrets choosing him in the first place, and that sucks as much as he does.
"I'm self-made from dealing with men like you my whole life."
Preach!
"They're backstabbing sluts!"
Women always stick together, except when they cut you from a magazine spread because your husband's dumb choices made you go bankrupt.
"Sell your toys, Gordon."
Gordon wasn't lying about being a creature of want. His "man cave" is a man-child's dream.
"Tell me to stop talking, please. Just all the time."
Renata is nothing if not honest, even when she's trying to play nice.
Fingers crossed that Renata will deliver at least one more scene-stealing line in the finale, but if not, we still have plenty to cherish.