10 Signs You Overthink Things Too Much

If you have a hard time making decisions, whether it's deciding what to eat at a restaurant or what to do for your career, you're likely overthinking things. "Instead, pick something, and course correct as needed," says psychologist Dr. Helen Odessky over email.

"If you tend to ignore your gut instincts and make long pros and cons lists. it's likely you're overthinking it," says Odessky. "Take a look at the pros and cons, but let your gut chime in." Your intuition is a surprisingly accurate tool: Research published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences found that when participants of the study were forced to choose between two options based on instinct alone, they made the right call up to 90 percent of the time.

A clear sign you are overthinking is that you spend a lot of time ruminating (going over and over the same thing in your head) about things that have happened in the past. "You pick over situations and conversations in your brain that could have happened last night or perhaps several years ago, and yet you are still thinking about it," says psychologist Dr. Sarah Allen over email. "It is exhausting. You are wasting your emotional energy thinking about it and it can leave you feeling physically and emotionally drained."

"When it seems more comfortable to avoid conversations with others or actually finding answers instead of replaying things in your head, this reinforces overthinking and can lead to you talking yourself out of something," says psychologist Marni Amsellem, Ph.D. over email. Instead of avoiding choices, you need to face your conflict head on.

You're likely overthinking decisions if the deadline you've given yourself has come and gone, many times. "You keep deferring, even after giving yourself a deadline," says Odessky.

When you overthink something, you often run it by with your friends, and if they start to get annoyed, it might be too much. "Your friends are getting tired of being asked about the same situation over and over," says Odessky. "Or maybe you're embarrassed to bring it up because they have heard it a million times before."

Some information is necessary when it comes to making a decision, but you have to draw the line somewhere. "Overthinking something too much means you won't be satisfied until you've read everything on the topic and asked everyone's advice before making up your mind," says Odessky.

Overthinking things can lead to you spending a lot of time in your head, which means you're not completely emotionally present when you are around others. "If you are focusing on your thoughts rather than the person in front of you, it can make them feel that you are not interested in them or what they are saying to you, which of course can be detrimental to the relationship," says Allen. Try to ground yourself by really focusing on where you are in the moment.

"Another sign is that you are sleep deprived because your ruminations are stopping you falling asleep or are waking you up in the middle of the night," says Allen. "You can overcome this by setting aside a time each evening that you sit down and write out the things you are thinking about. This can clear your head for when you are trying to sleep."

"Your overthinking is holding you back when anxiety prevents you from doing things or moving forward in your life," says Allen. "Usually this involves thoughts about “What if?" and then thoughts about all the things that could possibly go wrong."