Who do you turn to when you need good relationship advice? Some people ask their friends, some ask their families, some ask therapists, and some turn to good ol' Google to get their love advice on-demand. Chances are, whether you're wondering how to make a long-distance relationship work or how to get over a relationship once and for all, plenty of other people around the world are asking the same question too.
Google studied the aggregation of trillions of searches over this past year, using data from Google Trends and filtering out spam and repeat questions to compile a list that, according to their press release, "best reflects the spirit of 2017." What they found is that, at least in regards to relationships, people have questions, lots of questions, and when they need answers, they turn to Google. Which makes sense, because I know whenever I have a question, I'm told by whomever I'm asking that there's "a little thing called Google" I should try instead. It really does cut out all that unnecessary small talk, doesn't it?
Based on these top 10 most asked questions it's clear to see that when it comes to relationships, we're all a little bit confused and want healthy relationships. So if you found yourself Googling relationship-related questions this year, you weren't alone.
1What Does A Healthy Relationship Look Like?
Starting at number 10 on the top 10 list, is this question. A good one, right? A healthy relationship is something we're all striving for, but of course details will vary from person to person about what makes a good partnership. For the most part though, communication is key. Without communication, you really have nothing.
2How Do You Know Your Relationship Is Over?
While it might be safe to assume that if a person goes MIA it's over, in a world with ghosting, benching, breadcrumbing, and the like, who the hell really knows? But a good way to figure out if your relationship is over is if your partner stopped putting in effort. Relationships take work, and if one person stops, they probably want to bail.
3How To Get Out Of A Toxic Relationship?
Once you've identified that you're in a toxic relationship, that's one step in the right direction. Next up is realizing that that you deserve more.
"Someone might realize they are finally ready to move on from a [toxic relationship], when they have done some work on themselves, and have a better sense of self-esteem. They know what they want and what they deserve ... When they start to think of things in these terms, they know it is likely time to start to move on," Nicole Martinez, Psy.D., LCPC, tells Bustle.
4How To Get Over A Relationship?
One word: productively. And, of course, realizing you have better things to do with your time. Not to mention, life is too short to hem and haw over the past. I realize this is easier said than done.
"Consider how much energy you are wasting on thinking about your ex," Amy Levine MA, CSE sex coach and founder of Ignite Your Pleasure, tells Bustle. "Realize that redirecting that energy can change the course of your life and take action."
5What Is An Open Relationship?
While that can be simply answered with, "a relationship that allows the partners to see other people," each open relationship is different, in regards to its rules and parameters. Whether you agree to having sex with other people or having relationships with other people, communication is also essential when it comes to non-monogamy. And, of course, an open relationship isn't for everyone.
6How To Save Your Relationship?
Coming in at the halfway mark of the top 10 most Googled relationship-related questions is "how to save your relationship." Although some relationships may not be worth saving, for those relationships that can (and should) be worked on, therapy and lots of communication can help you get there. Or, if necessary, taking a break from your relationship could do the trick, too. It's all about what you and your partner decide is the best route to take.
7What Is A Poly Relationship?
As the nature of relationships change and other types of romantic dynamics bloom, it makes sense that "what is a poly relationship?" would be not just in the top 10, but the top five Googled relationship-related questions. But similar to open relationships (or any relationship, for that matter) there is no one way to have a poly relationship. Again, different parameters and rules apply for each relationship.
8How To Build Trust In A Relationship?
Since trust, along with communication, is the cornerstone to any healthy relationship, it's nice to see that people are Googling how to make this happen. For the most part, building trust in a relationship differs depending on each partner's past and what trust means to them. People trust differently depending on the experiences they've had.
9How To Change Your Relationship Status On Facebook?
The fact that this was asked in Google so many times, making it number two on the list, as opposed to being asked on Facebook, is what I find most interesting about this question — oh, and that people are still updating their relationship statuses. Of my friends who have relationship statuses, most are in a relationship with a donut or a slice of pizza or something, as opposed to a person.
10How To Make A Long-Distance Relationship Work?
Coming in at the top spot, at number one on the list, is "how to make a long-distance relationship work?" I had no idea that so many long-distance relationships existed! Good for them. Research has proven that people in long-distance relationships communicate better (that's actually what's going to make it work) and you get your bed all to yourself most of the time.
There you have it; the top 10 most Googled relationship-related questions of 2017. It looks like people were in curious about healthy relationships, as well as less traditional relationship models this year. Who knows what 2018 will bring, but hopefully we will have figured out how to update our relationship statuses by then.
