Humans are a funny thing. People spend half of their effort trying to reconnect with their humanity, and the other half trying to cover up the natural functions that literally everyone has. Well, I'm not afraid to talk about brilliant products and accessories for your toilet that practically make it your throne, nor the essential functions that go on in it. Just like essential bacteria and the act of sweating, going to the toilet isn't always considered 'polite' table talk. But it's a necessary part of the body, and in my opinion, it's high time people got comfortable with it.
In fact, back when I was taking nutrition classes, excrement was a topic that came up in pretty much 15-minute intervals. Anyone who's ever been a natural health practitioner knows it's the second thing you seem to disclose about yourself after your own name. It's estimated that we spend almost 92 days in the bathroom over the span of our lifetimes, and it's also been asserted that you can tell a whole lot about your health solely by looking at your poop. Consequently, it's time to get really comfortable in your bathroom, and these innovative toilet accessories can make things easier, more convenient, and significantly more enjoyable.
1This Genius Spray That Traps Smells Below The Surface
Poo-Pourri Before-You-Go Toilet Spray, $12, Amazon
This innovative spray called Poo-Pourri Before-You-Go is made of essential oils, and its purpose is to create a smell-proof barrier on the surface of the water, in order to trap any and all smells in the bowl. Simply spritz the bowl before you go, do your thing, and flush away, leaving no indication that anything ever happened. It's also travel-friendly for storage in your pocketbook. "A must have at the office," says one reviewer. "This has taken the fear out of walking out of the bathroom and running into the person WAITING to go next!"
2Squat While You Poop To Reduce Constipation
Squatty Potty, $22, Amazon
Recently, there's been tons of talk about how squatting while on the toilet is a much more natural and effective way to go, because it "[opens] the colon," making "elimination faster, more complete, and [less] straining." The Squatty Potty is a convenient little stool that lifts your legs up to the position, so you can lessen constipation and improve elimination. It comes in two sizes and fits any standard toilet.
3Find Your Way To This Glowing Toilet Light
Toilet Bowl Night Light, $14, Amazon
If you're a midnight pee-er, this toilet bowl night light is going to save your retinas on a nightly basis. It's motion activated and light sensitive, so it only turns on in a dark room when there's somebody there, and it lights up 16 bright colors to give your bathroom a little style.
4Add Something Extra To Your Toilet With A Reliable Bidet
Luxe Bidet Neo, $40, Amazon
Go like the Europeans go with this Luxe Bidet Neo. It's got a sleek design and high-quality parts that easily attach to any standard toilet, so you can rinse off after you do your thing. It's also got some really solid features like a retractable nozzle and a self-cleaning function for sanitary purposes. People love it because it's hardly noticeable, provides some really impressive water pressure, and installs in minutes.
5You'll Always Want To Keep This Cloud Shelf Well-Stocked
Cloudy Day Toilet Paper Storage, $99, Uncommon Goods
Brighten up your day with this adorable Cloudy Day toilet paper rack, which comes with everything you need to install this distinctive decoration on your bathroom wall. It's a genius storage solution for small spaces, and it ensures that your extra rolls are out of the way, but never too far.
6This Life-Saving Toilet Paper Stand For Your iPad
iPad Holder Toilet Paper Stand, $40, Amazon
If you're an avid toilet Facebooker, then the iPad holder toilet paper stand is for you. It fits the iPod 2, 3, or 4, it easily adjusts to any angle or position, and it provides some classy chrome decor that's both durable and sturdy. One particularly enthusiastic buyer even posted a 500 word review about how this device saved his life once. "Since the incident, I have purchased one for all of my loved ones. I urge you to do the same. It's too risky not to," he says.
7Convert Your Toilet Into A Hands-Free Flusher
TECHO Touchless Toilet Flush Kit, $43, Amazon
Germaphobe or not, a TECHO touchless toilet flush kit is something that anyone can appreciate. It uses reliable motion sensor technology to convert your toilet into a touchless flusher without replacing the current toilet or handle. Installation takes less than ten minutes, and reviewers are saying things like, "I would give this 10 STARS if they allowed it... It works flawlessly."
8A Toilet Paper Holder That Wirelessly Streams Your Music
iCarta 2 Universal Bluetooth Speaker, $70, Amazon
The iCarta 2 universal Bluetooth speaker actually turns your toilet paper roll into a fully-functional bluetooth speaker and holder for your devices. It runs on batteries and has up to 20 hours of playback time, and it clearly and loudly streams your music from up to ten meters away while you're in the bath or on the toilet.
9This Effective Purifier For The Back Of Your Toilet
OPERNEE Ecology Air Purifier, $20, Amazon
The OPERNEE Ecology air purifier is a genius little bathroom accessory because it's entirely natural, extremely effective, and looks like a classy back-of-the-toilet decoration. It uses diatomaceous earth, a naturally occurring soil, to soak up any and all smells in your bathroom, including dampness and mold, and it also helps remove bacteria and allergens.
10This Adorable Guestbook To Record Your Experience
The Bathroom Guestbook, $15, Uncommon Goods
A keepsake created by everyone who comes through your bathroom, the The Bathroom Guestbook gives your guests something to do and you something to read while you're doing your business. It allows room for doodles, thoughts, environmental assessments, and signatures for a bathroom experience as cheeky as you are.
Bustle may receive a portion of sales from products purchased from this article, which was created independently from Bustle's editorial and sales departments.
