Your Daily Pull
A Tarot Reading For Tuesday, April 29
That call from your mom was the last straw.
Every day, Bustle’s tarot writer Carolyn Steber turns to her deck to answer readers’ questions.
Q: I'm stuck in the middle of family drama. How do I stay sane? Should I try to broker peace?
A: I’m sure you can hear the ding! in your sleep. It’s the sound of your mom texting to complain about your brother for the 100th time. He never comes home to visit from college and your mom is making it your problem, even though you’re ridiculously busy at work.
Ding!
Oh, great. It’s another text, but this time it’s your dad, who your mom divorced 10 years ago, asking why his new girlfriend isn’t invited to the annual family beach vacation this summer. Every time you look at your phone it’s something else — someone’s mad, crying, or demanding your time — and you can genuinely feel your blood pressure rising.
Being stuck in the middle of family drama is the worst. If you’re the eldest daughter or the go-to therapist in your fam, it’s possible you’re used to everyone calling and dumping their angst on you, and you aren’t sure what to do about it. Should you put on DND and ignore them for a few days? Go no contact? Schedule a family FaceTime call? Here’s what the cards have to say.
How Can You Stay Sane During Family Drama?
The Knight of Swords represents drive, action, communication, and assertiveness — all great words to keep in mind when dealing with an annoying family — but it also suggests you feel the need to help everyone figure out their sh*t. This is why you haven’t blocked them yet.
You’ll answer texts at 6 a.m., field complaints, and even show up in person to help everyone calm down. While this is very noble of you to want to help, it also means you’re taking time away from work, your relationships, and even your own relaxation to help sort out other people’s lives.
To hang onto your sanity, let go of idea that you need to jump into action every single time someone complains or asks for help. Stop being available to your family 24/7. While it isn’t easy to leave your mom on read, it’s the only way she’ll realize that you aren’t her therapist.
Should You Try To Keep The Peace?
The Eight of Pentacles represents dedication, hard work, and focused effort, and that means yes, you should try to broker peace. Whatever the drama may be, it’s obvious at this point that no one in your life has the ability to successfully sort through issues on their own, and that means you will need to come to the rescue.
Instead of answering texts morning, noon, and night, organize a get-together with all the major players and encourage them hash it out once and for all. Do a FaceTime call with your mom and sister. Take your dad out for coffee and explain why he can’t bring his girlfriend to the beach. The formality and structure of the meeting will be more effective than your usual tactics.
If it doesn’t work, that’s when it’s time to set a boundary. Let them know you did your best to help and will now be ignoring any messages about the issue. Really mean it when you say it and hopefully they’ll focus their attention elsewhere — and you can finally sleep in peace.
For more, check out your horoscope.
