At 14, Kat Dennings Was Fulfilling Her Destiny

There’s an episode in Sex and the City Season 3 when Samantha is tasked with coordinating an extravagant bat mitzvah for an entitled teenager, Jenny Brier, whose demanding presence gives Kim Cattrall’s formidable character a run for her money.

“That was pretty huge for me,” says Kat Dennings of her first acting job. “My family didn’t have cable, so I didn’t know what the show was. [After] my final audition, my mom and I were in the cab to the train station, and then an entire building was the billboard for Sex and the City. I was like, ‘Oh, I guess that show’s kind of a big deal.’”

She was 14 at the time, commuting into New York from Wynwood, Pennsylvania, for auditions — after flying through homeschooling. (She graduated high school by age 13.) “I would get on the train with my mom to Penn Station, and we would walk around New York and go to an audition, get some Roy Rogers fried chicken, and go home,” says Dennings, now 38. “[Auditioning] is a brutal process, but I loved it. I thought it was so much fun.”

Her first TV job ultimately led to her breakout role as the sarcastic Max in CBS’ 2010 sitcom 2 Broke Girls, which was created by Sex and the City showrunner Michael Patrick King and ran for six seasons. This month, she stars in a new ABC sitcom, Shifting Gears, as a mom of two who moves in with her estranged dad, played by Tim Allen.

“I was one of those kids who loved her parents and had a great time. In this show, it’s definitely not that,” says the actor, whose fan base grew after roles in Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist, The House Bunny, and Thor. “My character was very close with her mom, [who] passed away. She and her dad, who were opposites in belief but very similar in personality, never got along.”

Below, Dennings looks back on life at 14, from first kisses and slow dances to acting alongside Kim Cattrall.

“I didn’t have issues with my body until people told me I should have issues with my body.”

Take me back to 2000. What was life like for you?

It was the best time of my life. Fourteen is such a big age. You’re discovering the music and things you like. It’s very vivid to me.

What was your favorite music?

I used to really love Hanson’s “Madeline.” That’s a great song, but I loved all of them. I was obsessed.

Did you ever get to meet them?

Yes, I was in a Hanson music video a few years ago. Because I’ve talked about Hanson so much publicly, they were like, “All right, would you like to be in a video?” I was like, “Yes, I’ll do it for free, or I’ll pay you to let me do it.” That was one of the biggest career moments for me.

Well, you started manifesting it at 14.

Exactly, manifestation is very powerful.

When exactly did you decide to pursue acting?

I started begging my parents around age 9, and they were like, “Let’s just ignore this, and maybe she’ll stop thinking about it.” But I did not. So I turned 10, and they were like, “OK, you can try it for a month, and if you like it, we could do another month, and if you don’t like it, we’ll stop.” Spoiler alert: I liked it. It never ended.

I mean, your first major screen role was in one of Sex and the City’s most memorable episodes. What do you remember from being on set and working with Kim Cattrall?

I just remember her being very fabulous. Sarah Jessica Parker was very kind. I got to keep a glittery zebra dress. I was just stunned by everything, because that was my first big thing I did, and that was the first time I ever had my hair flat ironed. I didn’t know you could change your hair to be straight if you have curly hair. It blew my mind.

I love how, for any curly girl, the first time they straighten their hair is such a pivotal moment in their life.

Totally.

What other pivotal moments happened at 14?

I think that was when I had my first kiss, which is disgusting to think about. And I went to my friend’s school dance, where I did my first slow dance with a boy to “My Heart Will Go On.” That was a pretty big deal.

Why is your first kiss disgusting to remember?

Because 14 now seems like a baby. Fourteen-year-olds shouldn’t be kissing. That’s all I feel now looking back. But it was an age-appropriate kiss, and I guess that’s fine.

Thinking of your Sex and the City character, she was talking about blow jobs and sex. Did that feel awkward at the time?

I didn’t know what those words meant. I had to ask my mom, and she was in hell. But I was saying it like it was anything; I didn’t bother thinking about what it was. I was just having the time of my life acting this very advanced character.

You mentioned being homeschooled; what was that like?

I was registered at a private school in my area, so I would get the books and do all the same work they did. I just didn’t really take breaks. So I graduated quickly, because I really, really wanted to work. I was around a lot of kids who were homeschooled, and that was really fun.

By focusing on your career at a young age, did you ever think you were growing up too fast?

No, I felt I was fulfilling my destiny. I always felt a little out of place with other kids. I wasn’t interested in the same stuff. I didn’t have time for it. I was going toward my goals, which now, as an adult, feels very unusual.

What did your version of hanging out with friends look like?

Oh, my God. Well, this was the Dark Ages. I didn’t have a cellphone. I had just gotten the Internet. We used to walk to the bookstore and hang out there all day. I never went anywhere without a notebook and a pen. We’d be sitting next to each other and write each other notes, and then pass them on. It was texting before texting. We would go to Sam Goody. We would buy CDs. We would go to Barnes & Noble and Borders, and get a coffee and walk around all day. It was heavenly.

That brings me back to hanging out at the mall, and you barely have any money, so you’re just saving it for one thing.

Like getting a pretzel! And then waiting for your parents to pick you up because there were no cellphones. It was like a totally different life experience.

Did you have a go-to outfit?

My favorite outfit was these huge parachute pants. They were quilted, navy and very shiny. I would wear an Old Navy or Delia’s long-sleeved top with thumb holes. Thumb holes were a big thing for me. I had those woven, rubbery chokers. I still have a lot of my jewelry. Thank God, I saved it from those days, like I had beaded anklets and bracelets and stuff with eight balls, flames, and eyeballs.

Do you remember how you were feeling about your body at 14? Did you feel comfortable in your own skin?

I felt very confident until I overheard kids talking about me. They were quite mean, and that changed my opinion of my body and myself. It kind of f*cked me up for life. I guess it has to happen sometime. Then I became an actress for real, and a lot of casting directors — they never say this now, you cannot say this stuff now — would be so ruthless. They were like, “She’s fat. She’s ugly. She’s not pretty enough.” It was really traumatizing, because I didn’t have issues with my body until people told me I should have issues with my body.

When I was 14, I got a show that went one season called Raising Dad with the late, great Bob Saget. On that show, the producers told me I needed to lose weight. They made me go to the gym on the lot with a personal trainer for an hour before work every day as a 14-year-old child. That was horrible, and it gave me a huge complex about what I looked like because adults were telling me I was fat.

First of all, there’s nothing wrong with being fat. What’s the f*cking problem? Thank God body positivity has happened. Anyone should be able to exist in their shape and size of body without being bothered.

I'm sorry you went through that. I remember feeling like the ugliest thing that ever existed, and when I look back at my photos of myself now, I’m like, “What were you thinking? You were so cute.”

It happens in adulthood, too. I remember being like, “Oh, I look horrible.” Then I look back, and I’m like, “I looked great. What’s wrong with me? I would love to look like that again.”

What do you think your 14-year-old self would think of you now?

Oh, I hope she’d be happy with the person I am. I think about my 14-year-old self a lot, and try to be more like the person I was hoping to be. I’ve done therapy where you’re encouraged to revisit certain things and think about your childhood self and keep her in the forefront. She’d be so excited. I wrote myself a letter at that age, asking adult-me a bunch of questions. I wish I had it, but I know one question was, have you met Hanson? The answer is yes to that, at least.

This interview was edited and condensed for clarity.