After the end of a long day, have you ever taken off your bra, and thanks to its dampness, realized that your boobs have created a massive amount of sweat? If you are a human with breasts, I imagine this experience has probably happened to you before; having boob sweat is inevitable, after all! If you have big boobs, especially, this is a problem that you most likely experience during the summer on the daily.
I know that boob sweat is something I deal with all of the time and it's quite annoying. Unless you've just had a killer workout at the gym, sweating is not something most of us want to do. It's gross, wet, and can make you smell like you haven't showered in weeks. It's also extremely uncomfortable to deal with, since there's no polite way to wipe your boob sweat away. You have to either reach under your shirt and wipe or try to discreetly use your skirt to wipe away the sweat — both of which usually draw attention to yourself. Personally, I don't think wiping your boob sweat should be perceived as weird or socially inappropriate; but it's probably going to elicit some stares.
There are so many things those of us with boob sweat can bond over and usually don't get a chance to, since boob sweat isn't a topic that typically comes up over drinks. So, in an attempt to create some boob sweat community, here are 12 things everyone with boob sweat will understand.
1. You Feel Like You're Drowning
If you leave your boob sweat un-wiped for long enough, it can start to feel like your ta-tas are sitting in a puddle. No one likes sitting in a puddle. All of us with boob sweat have had to deal with leaving it unattended for far too long, and felt like our boobs were the equivalent of a soggy towel.
2. It Hurts Like A....
Boob sweat isn't just unpleasant; it can actually be painful. Because your under boob represents a dark cave, it's the perfect breeding ground for bacteria. This can lead to the development of rashes or even worse, a yeast infection. The reason I know of the latter is because, true story, I got an under boob yeast infection in college. Yep, it was as gross and painful as it sounds.
3. You Might Smell, Even If You're Clean
Because of the bacteria that I talked about in my previous point, boob sweat can also lead to some unpleasant odors that could make you feel like you've never bathed. Boob sweat doesn't smell like flowers, and if you try to wipe it, that can lead to the smell coming out for the world to sniff. No bueno.
4. Bras Are Your Worst Enemy
I don't wear bras anymore unless I'm working out, but I know that when I did my under boob sweating problem was much worse than it is these days. If you think about it, a bra holds your boobs in, so it's going to be a host for all of that sweat with nowhere to go. When you're braless, your sweat can more naturally dissipate. So the lesson here is that bras are the arch nemesis of under boob sweat.
5. You Take Frequent Bathroom Breaks
Bathroom breaks aren't just for peeing anymore, as they're the perfect opportunity to get your boob sweat under control so you can comfortably move about during your day.
6. Cotton Is Your BFF
Tight, thick fabrics only make your boob sweat problem 1000 times worse, which means that cotton and other soft, breathable fabrics are your boobs' saving grace.
7. You Take Frequent Showers
All of that boob sweat can lead to some serious B.O. and that makes taking showers a lot more necessary for us than it is for dudes and/or those with smaller boobs. Talk about injustice! Can someone just invent a more efficient way to clean yourself? Boob sweat doesn't smell like flowers, but maybe it should.
8. You've Been Caught Touching Your Boobs
We've all had to find ways to wipe away the gross sweat that's accumulated underneath our boobs and we've probably also been seen by others while doing it. It generally looks like you're touching your boobs for no reason, considering those without boob sweat probably don't fondle their breasticles in public.
9. Those Sweat Stains...
Everyone knows about the pitfalls of pit stains (pun fully intended), but boob sweat stains look 10 times as awkward. They really need to invent a fabric that is immune to sweat stains so that we don't have evidence of our boob sweat on our clothes.
10. The Relief Of The Day's End
You know that good feeling you get when you take off your bra at the end of the day? That's the same feeling those of us with boob sweat have multiplied by 10. Sweet relief!
11. Air Conditioning Is The Most Important Thing
Air conditioning is essential for those of us with boob sweat to ward off the sweatiness. If we have to be outside for long stretches, have no A/C, or go somewhere with no A/C, the struggle is real.
12. Cleavage Can Be Totally Unsexy
Cleavage might look sexy, but it is usually the perfect place to collect boob sweat. Except in very, um, particular situations, no one really wants their ta-tas to be drenched.
Images: Fotolia; Giphy (12)