Sex is good. OK, let me rephrase that: Sex is great. And sex in a loving and caring relationship is amazing. Nothing compares to getting down and dirty with your loved one. Being intimate and vulnerable with your lover is indescribably wonderful. With that being said, sex isn’t everything. When it comes to relationships, there needs to be more than a good lay. You’ve got to have other qualities that can carry you two through time. Being good in the sack can only get you so far.
It’s totally acceptable to focus on your sex life with your partner. In fact, having great sex, where both of you feel fulfilled, is critical. However, some couples put too much emphasis on the sexual relationship, and not enough in other areas. This is why some relationships don’t make it past the hot and heavy honeymoon stage. When shit gets real and the sex is all you’ve got, it doesn’t leave you with much. That is why it’s important to remember the other things that are critical for a relationship to be happy and healthy. You’re going to want to nurture these things if you want to have a long-lasting and loving relationship.
1. Trust
All the great sex in the world doesn’t matter if you don’t have trust. Trust is one of the most significant factors in a relationship. You need to trust your partner. You need to trust your other half with your heart. Trust that he or she would stay true to you. Trust that he or she has your best interest at heart. Trust that he or she will never try and hurt you. Sex is great, but trust just one-upped it.
2. Respect
I don’t recall Aretha Franklin’s hit being about sex. It was all about respect. You and your partner should respect each other. You both need to respect each other’s time, values, space, etc. Once you start to lose respect, you’ve lost the whole relationship. No amount of amazing hot sex can bring it back.
3. Love
This one is probably a given. You can love sex, but if you don’t truly love the person you’re going to bed with, you’ve got nothing. Love is an indescribable feeling, that is not easy to put into words. But, you know when you feel it, and you know when you don’t. Sex and love can go together, but they are also two very different things.
4. Passion
Now, you might think I am referring to passionate sex. Well, that is great, but I’m actually touching upon passion towards the relationship. It’s crucial that you and your partner feel passionate about one another. That means, your passion of being together is strong and will carry you through the rough times. You need to be passionate and dedicated to making the relationship work, because it’s not always going to be rainbows and butterflies. (If only)
Try: Relationship Advice: How to Rekindle and Cultivate Healthy, Passionate, and Long-Lasting Relationships, $2.99, Amazon
5. Loyalty
Knowing that your significant has your back can be more important that getting it while lying on your back. You want to know that your partner will stand up for you in any situation. Having that knowledge that your boyfriend or girlfriend will be there by your side to protect you and that you’re a team is essential.
6. Support
Having a supportive partner who pushes you to be the best is key. Every strong and happy relationship has that supportive foundation. Whether that looks like your partner telling you that you “can do anything you put your mind to,” or supporting you through the roughest moments of your life — you’ll be ever so thankful.
7. Communication
Talking dirty in bed can be such a turn on. But you know what is also a turn on in a relationship? Talking things through in general. Having open and honest communication is essential to a long-lasting relationship. You need to be able to voice your opinion, and so does your partner. Being able to express yourself and communicate your needs and wants will help you achieve a lifetime of happiness with your significant other.
Check Out: A Couple's Guide to Communication, $29.99, Amazon
Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our new podcast, I Want It That Way, which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page.
Images: arthurhidden/Fotolia; Giphy (7)
