How To Pay Attention To Nipples During Sex

PSA: Boobs aren’t just for feeding tiny baby mouths and getting in the way while you’re trying to exercise. When expertly handled, boobs have the ability to enhance your orgasm and just generally make you feel all tingly. How, you may ask, does one accomplish such a feat? By using nature’s pleasure buttons (read: nipple stimulation), of course. While some women have more sensitive nipples than others, with proper attention paid to them, almost all nipples have the power to increase your sexual pleasure. To make a long scientific story short, studies show that the sensation you get from having your nipples stimulated travels to roughly the same part of the brain as sensations from your vagina, clitoris, and cervix. In fact, some women are even able to achieve the elusive nipples-only orgasm (though I cannot personally attest to this phenomenon).

Unfortunately, some people don’t understand the delicate art of nipple arousal. You can’t just bat at a nipple like a cat trying to catch a moth. There’s an intimate process that varies depending on your partner’s nipple sensitivity and personal preference. Everyone has unique and beautiful nipples, so here’s how to reach Nipple Nirvana, regardless of your sensitivity level.

For very sensitive nipples:

You’ll want to be careful here, lest your partner tickles your nipples in the PG way instead of the NC-17 way and causes you to writhe around in a fit of giggles. During foreplay, start with some ever-so-gentle touching/light brushing of the fingers across the nipple of your choice (or both, if your partner has two free hands). Have him or her keep one hand focused on lightly rubbing your nipple while the other explores your vagina and clitoris. When you make the switch to intercourse, don’t forget to keep the nips involved — it’s surprising how effective the added sensation of nipple play can be in achieving orgasm. The good news about sensitive nipples is that gentle pinching or rubbing can be enough to satiate you; the bad news is that your partner needs to be tuned into your body language to know if the sensation on your nipples is too much and potentially causing pain or discomfort. Whether you do or don’t like something, always be honest with your partner; sex will only get better if he or she knows what you really enjoy.

For standard sensitivity nipples:

To be fair, I’m not entirely sure what ‘standard’ means when it comes to nipples, but I’d probably put myself in this category. Too often I’ve found myself not knowing how to tell a guy that it’s okay to be a little rough in the nipple area. From personal experience, it sometimes seems like they’re scared they’ll accidentally rip them off or something (valid concern TBH). If you can handle a little pressure on your nipples but can’t necessarily deal with full-on biting, sucking might be a good option for you. Of course, gentle touching, kissing, and licking is never a bad thing, but be sure to tell your partner if your nipples need slightly more aggressive attention during foreplay. During intercourse, try to have your partner maintain constant contact with the nipples, firmly pinching or rubbing them regardless of your position (though missionary, girl-on-top, and side-by-side work well for this). And ladies, if your partner can’t reach your nipples to continue the stimulation started during foreplay, you should definitely touch your own nipples — after all, you probably know how to work them best anyway.

For barely sensitive nipples:

If you’re into nipple play but need even more stimulation to do the trick, it might be time to consider carefully bringing in teeth. As a rule of thumb, it’s always best to start small when wading into uncharted sexual territory. If you’re comfortable, let your partner graze your nipple with his or her teeth. When and if you decide that feels good, your partner can work up to gently biting the skin on your breast before taking the nipple itself between his or her teeth. As with anything, communicate what feels good or what is too much. If you’re looking to bring in toys to help continue some intense, hands-free nipple stimulation into intercourse, consider purchasing a pair of nipple clamps. They may look scary, but they’re immensely helpful if you want your nipples to remain part of the action with minimal effort on either your or your partner’s part. That kind of intense pressure on your nipples coupled with penetration or oral is sure to increase your arousal and hopefully amp up your orgasm.

For women who do not like to have their nipples touched at all:

Don’t touch them. (Unless they ask you to, for some reason.)

For men:

No, it’s not just women who enjoy some nipple action from time to time. You won’t know unless you ask, but if you’re with a guy whose nipples bring him sexual pleasure, follow the same rules as above. At the end of the day, nipples are nipples — we all have them, and touching/licking/sucking a guy’s is no different.

(Not a great insult.)

So regardless of your nipple play preferences, always remember that open communication with your partner is the key to maximizing sexual pleasure. If I accomplish nothing else, my one great hope is that I’ve started the Nipple Revolution, leaving no nipple untouched, yearning to be stimulated. Go forth and orgasm!

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