Entertainment
11 Celebrities' 'Real Housewives' Tag Lines, Because Some Of These Stars Need To Be Cast, STAT
I am obsessed with the Real Housewives franchise. I am not sure why, but I really identify with these menopausal women. But I'm not the only one. There are plenty of celebrity Real Housewives fans who are pretty open about their love for the show. Not only do they obsess over the show, but they fantasize about being on it.
There are plenty of celebrities who have come up with their own Real Housewives introduction tag lines. You know what I'm talking about. Those clever one-liners in the beginning of each episode, usually accompanied by a semi-dramatic hair flip. These 11 celebrities came up with tag lines so good that I really wish they were on the show.
Khloe Kardashian
Khloe Kardashian has always been my favorite person in the Kardashian family and the Real Housewives tag line she shared on Watch What Happens Live solidifies it: “I am a bad ass bitch and I own it.” Damn right she is. And this is why I am obsessed with her.
Lady Gaga
Lady Gaga is such a fascinating and surprising human being, so I’m not at all surprised that she pulled out such a random Real Housewives tag line on WWHL: “They may say I’m a woman, but underneath I’m all man.”
Kelly Ripa
I would be so happy if Kelly Ripa was actually a Real Housewife. At first she threw out a great intro line on WWHL, but it was pretty standard to be honest: “I’m a Jersey girl. Nothing can get me down.” And then she really went there with her second try “I’m an A cup. Nothing can bring me down except for my long bosom.” She cracks me up.
Giuliana Rancic
If Giuliana Rancic didn’t have such a cushy job at E! she would be an ideal addition to Real Housewives, so I figured she would have a fantastic line, to be honest: “I love fashion and I love TV hosting, but I love my baby and husband even more.” You could do so much better, G.
Andy Cohen
It only makes sense that the man behind the franchise came up with his own Real Housewives intro line. So how would Andy Cohen introduce himself? “I may be a man, but I fight like a girl," he shared on The Tonight Show. I expect nothing less from the Bravo super star.
Jimmy Fallon
Jimmy Fallon would make an excellent addition to the franchise with this opening line he shared on The Tonight Show: “When I walk into a room, I host it. I would love to write you a thank you note, but I’m not sure you know how to read.” There could be one Real Househusband, right?
Michael Strahan
Michael Strahan was anything but shy with the Real Housewives tag line he shared on WWHL: “I don’t know what sexy is. I just am.” That kind of confidence is such prime material.
Laverne Cox
If she wasn’t a super successful actress, Laverne Cox could have considered getting into reality television. The Real Housewives of Atlanta superfan came up with “I don’t start fights. I finish them," on WWHL.
RuPaul
RuPaul didn’t disappoint with his shot at an introduction line on WWHL. What did he go with? “Scam money don’t make money, but freak money do.” That needs to be a real thing. We need more RuPaul on TV.
Sarah Silverman
I really expected something good from Sarah Silverman considering she’s a comedian, but on WWHL she went with “Keep overhead low." Well, that’s sort of boring...