Play-Doh Might Be The Star Of A Live-Action Movie

Play-Doh is coming to a move house near you. And no, I don't mean that nasty glob of Doh smashed into the upholstery of a theater seat by a child. According to Deadline, 20th Century Fox and Hasbro are chit chatting about making a live-action Play-Doh movie. Deadline reports Paul Feig is in talks to direct, and Jason Micallef (writer of 2011 butter carving contest indie flick Butter) is slated to pen the script. Let’s rewind the tape back: It’s a LIVE-ACTION Play-Doh movie. Excuse me, what? Why live-action? To quote James Whitbrook at iO9, "HOW IS THIS NOT A CLAYMATION FILM?" Was that too obvious a move? What will this movie look like? Will the Play-Doh canisters have googly eyes? Will the Doh talk? Will the Doh interact with the humans? Don't get me wrong, I'm intrigued by this weird premise and am a big fan of Feig, but what could a live-action Play-Doh movie possibly be about?

Play-Doh movie plot guess #1

A collection of Play-Doh canisters band together to fight a common enemy: the 9-year-old owner who won’t stop forgetting to put the lids back on the containers. The Play-Doh army has watched one too many of their brethren dry out and be thrown in the garbage. The Doh frames the kid for eating all of the brownies his dad made for the school bake sale. The kid did not eat the brownies, but the evidence planted by the Doh—a trail of Play-Doh pieces from the kid's bedroom to the empty brownie tray—suggests otherwise. His parents ground him for a week and take away his toys, including his tub of Play-Doh cans. When the humans aren't looking, the Play-Doh cans make a break for it through the doggie door. They cheer as they hop down the street. Vic-doh-ry!

Play-Doh movie plot guess #2

There’s a kid who has the power to communicate with Doh. No one believes him except his 3rd grade teacher. The kid is terrorized by the Play-Doh toys that can sprout hair, but befriends a can of yellow Doh. Eventually, the kid and the teacher realize—spoiler alert!—the teacher has been Play-Doh the whole time. The kid has been ditching his real class for months. Instead, he’s been hanging out in an empty classroom with a giant Play-Doh sculpture. I guess it's The Sixth Sense but with Play-Doh?

Play-Doh movie plot guess #3

It’s a rom-com that takes place at the Play-Doh factory. Two of the employees in charge of the lid machine fall in love. However, one made a promise to himself that he’d never his mix work life and his dating life. Will he bend his own rule? Or will he spend the rest of his life regretting not giving their love a chance? There are plenty of flirty laughs, stolen glances, and Doh.

Play-Doh movie plot guess #4

It's a Romeo & Juliet-esque tale: For as long as either family can remember, it's been the Play-Dohs vs. the Gaks. The two opposing sides are tested when Princess Purple Play-Doh and Prince Pizza-Scented Gak fall for each other. There's a Play-Doh/Gaks battle, but a human walks in the playroom just as King Glow-in-the-Dark Gak is holding the King Gold Play-Doh underneath a lamp. Everyone has to stop what they're doing and resume their normal places in the room. Hoping to make a statement to both families, Princess Purple pretends to forget to secure her lid and dry out. Prince Pizza doesn't know it's a ruse, so he freaks out, follows her lead, and actually dries up. When Princess Purple realizes Prince Pizza is dried up for real, she rolls onto the carpet and collects as much dust and hair as she can. When a human sees the hair-covered ball of Play-Doh, the human disposes of her immediately. The Dohs and the Gaks mourn together. In honor of Princess Purple and Prince Pizza, the Dohs and the Gaks pull the plug on the feud once and for all.

My vote for the next toy-turned-movie character: Kooshlings.

Honestly, it's a crime those smiling orbs of joy don't have their own film franchise.