Conan Parodies Vaccine Debate And It's All SADLOLZ

In his latest parody video, late-night funny man Conan O’Brien takes on a very real issue plaguing American families: What do we do with unvaccinated children? The recent measles outbreak at Disneyland—which has now spread to 17 states and affected at least 121 people—has led to intense debate about the ethics of requiring vaccinations at schools and universities, with many arguing that the safety of the larger community must take precedence over individuals’ freedom of choice. O’Brien presents a practical solution to the problem: Let all kids, vaccinated and unvaccinated, attend school together—just be sure to keep the unvaccinated little ones locked inside giant plastic bubbles. Easy! The video hilariously depicts how “Kind Hearts Daycare” helps these bubble-bound children live normal lives by allowing them to take part in activities like playing on the playground, napping, and being fed pudding through a thick plastic covering. The faux-commercial boasts:

Here at kind hearts daycare, we’ve created a safe environment for all children, vaccinated and unvaccinated, to grow together as complete equals. We provide a safe, non-judgmental environment, where all children can enjoy a carefree existence without ever being made to feel different just because they’re at risk of contracting and spreading deadly and previously eradicated diseases.

Seriously, we’re laughing about this because otherwise we’d be crying. This parody perfectly highlights how ludicrous it is for parents to leave their children unvaccinated. In much of the writing that’s emerged from the recent measles outbreak, writers focus on the great dangers that parents who choose not to vaccinate their kids pose to those who, due to age or medical issues, are not able to be vaccinated. This video reminds us that kids with anti-vaxxer parents are victims in this whole mess, too. They don’t have a choice about being unvaccinated, and their parents’ “obstinacy or ignorance or fear” puts them at risk of both serious disease and having doors closed to them throughout their lives in the interest of public safety. Measles is no laughing matter. It is highly contagious (90 percent of people close to an infected person will contract the disease), and serious complications include pneumonia, permanent hearing loss, and death. Vaccinate your kids, everyone!

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