Entertainment
What Was French Wearing on 'the Hamptons'?
A mystery struck Sunday night’s episode of Kourtney and Khloe Take the Hamptons . A mystery that would haunt me forever (well, until I finally re-watched the relevant clip, that is): What the what is French Montana wearing?! Allow me to set the stage: Khloe Kardashian and French Montana walked into kitchen of the Hamptons house to greet Hamptons houseguests Pastor Rich and DawnChere. But this wasn’t your run-of-the-mill “welcome to the Hamptons house” greeting. Because French was topless and wearing an unidentified garment around his lower half.
I did not hear the explanation for his ensemble. I was too busy texting about French's pajamas with my friend. Neither of us knew what what we were looking at, but we were happy about it nonetheless.
Here's everything I thought the garment could possibly be:
- A towel
- A Snuggie
- A pillow case
- A bed sheet
- A table cloth
- A picnic blanket
- A silk cape
- A velvet robe
- A satin cloak
- A quilt made out of black cloth napkins
- A quilt made out of black placemats
- A canvas tarp dyed with the black blood of bugs
- A blanket coated with tar
- A fancy garbage bag
- A laundry hamper liner
- A pelt
- A seal's hide
- A hallucination
- A hologram
- An illusion
- A dream
- A wish
I had to learn the truth. I had to hear what it was French and Khloe said about the mystery article of clothing. So, I sought out the clip and listened closely. The answer: a t-shirt. French ran out of clean shorts, so he got resourceful: He grabbed a t-shirt, stuck his feet through the armholes, and called it a day.
Dangit, I almost had it.
I love French Montana.