Taylor Swift's AMA Outfit is Something Else, Y'all

Last time we saw her at an awards show, she bore a striking resemblance to a can of Alpha-bit soup. This time, she's a dead ringer for Sasha Cohen. Taylor Swift's AMA outfit is essentially a professional ice-skater's costume, which proves no matter how extreme that pop makeover gets, she'll never forget her roots as the kind of girl who only wears various shades of gold.

The 1989 singer performed "Blank Space" at the American Music Awards on Sunday in a brass-hued beaded frock. Clearly, Swift's stylists had something between The Great Gatsby and the Winter Olympics in mind when they chose her outfit. Her hair was styled in a signature curled 'lob,' and she's rocking the signature red lip that we've all come to revere neo-swift for. While I'm glad that this spectacle kept true to the music video's theme of Taylor being her own woman in the attic, I desired far more camp from this performance. Why? Because I've got a fever that only Taylor Swift's Chanel mascara-smeared face can hope to cure.

If only the Love Story-era Swift of the many cowboy boots and minidresses could see herself today; a million surprised-face emojis couldn't encapsulate her incredulity at the contemporary version of herself. Maybe, just maybe, she'll reveal that elusive belly button one day.