Relationships are complicated. There are moments of pure bliss, and then there are times when you question everything. Through the valleys and peaks, it’s hard to be certain whether or not you two are meant to be, or meant to be done. Sure, in every relationship, you need to be able to work through the “bad” together. But, when do you say enough is enough? At what point do you draw the line between rough times and simply just settling?
After every toxic relationship ends, usually people say they wish they could have seen the signs. There are always signs, but our “love can conquer all” glasses won’t let us see them.
Here is a little reminder of signs that might be pointing to the end of a relationship. But just remember, the tragic end of something is the beginning to a fresh start.
Name Calling
Words hurt, and words hurt a relationship. Name calling and hurtful words sting. It leaves a mark on a relationship that no apology can wash away. How can you respect a person after they call you all the horrible names in the book? Methinks it’s time to find a new story to tell.
The Trust is Gone
You need to be able to trust your partner. Checking each other's phones, social media accounts, and emails is not the foundation of a healthy relationship. If your relationship is starting to look less like a Nicholas Sparks movie and more like a Sherlock Holmes one, then you might want to make a run for it.
Bad > Good
When the bad outweighs the good, it’s time to measure how much you want to be committed in this relationship. Sure, there are going to be hard times between the two of you. But if you can’t even remember the last time you were happy, there’s a problem.
Lack of Sex
Sex is crucial in a happy and healthy relationship. And when sex isn’t on the table anymore (literally or not), it’s a sign something bigger is happening. It appears you two have grown distant, emotionally and physically.
Avoiding Spending Time Together
When you’d rather spend a night out with the ladies every weekend than with your partner, there seems to be an issue at hand. If you are happy in your relationship, you will want to spend time together — not the opposite. If you’re making excuses to not see your mate, then you should examine your excuses of why you haven’t ended things yet.
One-Sided Effort
To build a strong relationship foundation, both partners need to put in work. If only one is left building, that person will become exhausted and later on, resentful. You need two helping hands if you want to end up holding hands.
Fighting
Arguing in a relationship comes with the territory. Each couple is bound to have everything from insignificant fights to explosive, mascara-running-down-your-cheek fights. But when your relationship becomes like, “Wow! We made it a day without fighting,” you might need to take a look in the relationship mirror. If you can’t even stay civil on vacation in a beautiful hotel room with room service, then it might be time to say goodbye.
Fantasizing
It’s all fun and games until you can’t stop thinking about other men or women. In a happy and strong relationship, you should be thinking about your partner all of the time. But when unhappiness starts to creep in, so do thoughts and fantasies about other people. This is maybe the point where attention from other men or women fills an emptiness you’re feeling. Or you drunkenly text your ex, not because you’re missing him or her, but because your relationship is missing something. It’s normal to fantasize about other people, but trust me, you know when it’s past the point of no return.
Complaining
Ah, girls’ nights — drinking and dancing with the ladies. And oh wait, whoops, I can’t stop complaining about my boyfriend.You know when you’re that person. You realize you’re constantly complaining, but you can’t seem to stop venting about every negative thing. You know you should stop because your friends already hate your partner, but you feel like a boiling pot ready to explode. If you’re this pot, it might be time to cool it off and cool off that relationship.
Image: Ruths138/Flickr
