Ranking Ross' Girlfriends From 'Friends' Because They Can't All Be Rachels

Rachel’s sister Jill is a bad person. She’s selfish, self-absorbed, and completely unaware of general etiquette, such as not dating the former love of your sister’s life. Plus, she totally used Ross to make Rachel mad — not cool.

“But wait!” You might say. “Janice was Chandler’s girlfriend.” Yes, she was — but in Season 5, it was Ross who went out on a few dates with the embodiment of nails on a chalkboard. I actually like Janice enough — she’s annoying, but she means well — but this pairing wouldn’t have ever worked out, mostly because none of Ross’ friends would be able to stand her.

Cheryl was the hot paleontologist Ross was really excited about dating — until he saw her apartment. Cheryl and Ross had a lot of things in common and probably would have had a fairly successful relationship — you know, if her place didn’t look like a nuclear bomb went off and the only thing that survived were Doritos crumbs and the rats.

Ross met Mona at Monica and Chandler’s wedding, and then reconnected a few weeks later. Of course, by that time, Rachel was already pregnant with Ross’ baby, which posed its own unique challenges for Mona and Ross’ relationship. Ultimately, Mona was kind of dull — sure, she was nice, pretty, and seemingly smart, but there was nothing particularly unique about her. It was hard to believe Ross and Mona were together for so long in the first place.

Elizabeth was nice enough, and genuinely seemed to care about Ross. Of course, she was also his former student and almost 15 years his junior. Maybe if they were both older their relationship would have worked out, but Elizabeth just wasn’t mature enough to deal with Ross’ very grownup life, which included a young son. Sure, Ross doesn’t mention Ben nearly as much as he should, but like… yeah. Those things matter.

Charlie was crazy smart, beautiful, and had an actual personality. Unfortunately, she’s not the greatest girlfriend — she cheated on Joey with Ross, and proceeded to get back together with her ex while she and Ross were still an item. Ultimately, Charlie is a cool girl who doesn’t know what she wants, which is fine for her — it’s just not fine for Ross.

If you watched the show solely for Rachel’s eyes, Emily is Satan’s spawn. But I give Emily a little bit more credit than that — she truly cared about Ross and he totally screwed her over. Think about it — this is a woman who moved across the globe to be with the man she loved, only to hear him say his ex-girlfriend’s name at their wedding. She was a little unreasonable about forcing Ross not to see Rachel, but I don’t blame her for being insecure — frankly, I wouldn’t take Ross back after that. She’s a little rigid and controlling, which is why she doesn’t rank higher on this list, but I think we all need to collectively back off of Emily when we talk about terrible significant others on Friends — she did her best!

I liked Bonnie! I really did. She didn’t have much to say during her arc on the series, but you could tell that there was something brewing underneath that scalp of hers. She was friends with Phoebe, which automatically gets her major points. Plus, you could tell she was totally weird deep down — it really is a shame we didn’t get to know Bonnie a little better.

You want your friends to date a girl like Julie — she was smart, sweet, and fun, which is often overshadowed by the fact that she was also Rachel’s romantic rival. Hell, she even got along with Monica! In a world where Rachel and Ross were never a thing, Julie would be the best thing for Ross.

Of course, Ross and Rachel WERE a thing, ARE a thing, and will forever BE a thing. I don’t need to tell you that their love story is epic — I think Rachel getting off the plane to be with Ross did that for all of us. Sorry, other girls — Ross was always taken in his heart.