Life
The 11 Most Insane GIFs In Existence
I have a GIF problem. It's getting to a point where unless I can communicate via GIF, I'm better off not communicating at all. Remember when our forms of communication where limited but so much more personal? If you wanted to talk to someone far away you either had to traverse mountains or send them sprawling personal missives. Now we've got our phones but most of us hate talking on them, opting instead to text message. Most people I know actually get the shakes and start assuming someone is literally dead if their phone rings and they're faced with having to use real words to converse. As soon as smartphones became gif-friendly, they became my only way of communicating. Forget Emojii – if I couldn't say it using a quippy and strange clip of Salem the cat, it probably wasn't worth saying at all.
But it's not like this fresh tactic has limited the way I engage with the world. In fact, I defy anyone to tell me a sentiment, emotion, or reaction that cannot be effectively (nay, superiorly) be communicated via GIF. Did your face explode? There's a gif for that. Are you worried about zombies? There's a GIF for that. When it comes to the vast array that makes up the human experience, GIFs have got you covered. Allow me to show you just what I mean:
1. When Your Kitten Has Become an Alien
You wake up to the smell of burning. You look down and see that your feet are on fire, and that your kitten is speaking in a strange new language, while hovering just above the mattress, universes contained in his gaze. There's a GIF for that.
2. When You Spot Some Sweet Eye-Candy
You have spotted a guy who is dope as frig. He's got a booty that won't quit, and a face that would make Ryan Gosling cry. You could text all your friends and be all "HOTTIE ALERT" or you could make it clear how finger-licking good this guy really is by sending the GIF made for just such a sighting.
3. When You Want to Have Sex With a Panther
When bae is all, "Share with me your kinkiest fantasies. What have you always wanted to try in bed?" You could quietly explain to him that you've always wanted to watch him tenderly cup a panther's balls, or you could spare yourself the challenge and send the GIF perfectly made for answering such a query.
4. When You've Become a Murderous Banana
Everyone is wondering why you're acting so strangely. What they don't know is that over the course of the evening, you've been transformed (through no fault of your own) into a deviant, maniacal, and potentially murderous banana. As a banana, being that you have no thumbs, composing texts can be challenging. Luckily, there's a GIF for that.
5. When You Have Had a Terrifying Dream About Evil Clowns and Snickers Bars
Your best friend wakes you in the morning with a text asking you if you had any cool dreams during the night. You, in fact, had an evening riddled with nightmares involving powerful evil clown women hurling Snickers bars at you, but you worry that if you type this out, the horror of the actual dream will be lost. Luckily, there's a GIF that will more than convey the terror.
6. When You Forget How Your Fancy Toothbrush Works
Writing a panicked "you guys, I think my toothbrush might be broken" message will never not be a shameful endeavor. But if you decide that the situation is dire enough that you need to share, there's a GIF that will put it all in context for your nearests and dearests.
7. When You're Worried About The Current State of American Politics
I'm not always a deft soul when it comes to discussing my political beliefs. I don't like conflict. Or Republicans. Ha ha ha ha, I've made myself laugh. If someone is trying to convince me via text or email that America's political state is JUST FINE, I send the GIF made for proving they are wrong and effectively end the conversation, walking away as the champion.
8. When Your Cats Are Drunk
If you go around telling people your cats are drunk, folks might report you to animal control. But by sharing this GIF, you make it perfectly clear that you aren't the one responsible for their partying antics. When it comes to your cats, they are all "TURNT DOWN FOR WHAT" and you've got nothing to do with it.
9. When There's a Happy But Deranged Man Living In Your Vents
Have you heard the story about that guy who discovered a woman had been living in his cupboards for, like, months? And everyone thought he was crazy? Until he set up hidden cameras? Learn from him. If you suspect a man is living in your vents, set up cameras, and once you capture proof, send the video links to your mailing list, accompanied by this GIF.
10. When Your Sentient Dog-Head-Hair Is Thirsty And Also You Are Thirsty
It can hard explaining to coworkers that your hair is part sentient spaniel. Rather than drafting a carefully worded mass email, just send out this GIF. It will be sure to keep everyone on the same page and wise-ass remarks to a minimum.
11. When You Try to Write a Letter But Are Tripping On LSD
You made plans to write your long-distance bestie an epic email. But then you took some LSD and quietly lost your mind. You could wait until your trip has concluded and write a mea culpa note, or you could forward this GIF tailor-made to explain just what your Tuesday night entailed and all will be forgiven.
Images: Giphy(11)