Life

If Disney Princesses Were Real...

by Lucia Peters

We’ve already taken a look at why most Disney princes would make truly awful boyfriends… but let’s not forget that the Disney princesses have some issues of their own, too. That’s what BuzzFeed tackles in their latest video, “If Disney Princesses Were Real” — and believe you me, after watching it, you’ll think twice about wanting to become a fairy tale princess yourself. Seriously, you guys. I love Disney as much as the next gal, but I would never, ever want to star in my own Disney story.

The video is ambitious even by BuzzFeed’s standards; rather than just a series of vignettes, this time, it comes complete with a loose plot and a cast of thousands (OK, maybe not literal thousands… but it’s pretty big). The story tells the tale of a girl named Laila who, for as long as she’s lived, has wanted nothing more than to become a Disney princess. There’s just one thing: All her best friends, who actually are Disney princesses, are kind of the worst. The whole video is definitely worth watching, so scroll down to see it — but in the meantime, here’s a sampling of the sort of toxic friends Disney princesses would be in real life:

Cinderella: The Debbie Downer

She hates her job. Her stepsisters are the worst. No one will buy her a drink. She can’t find a boyfriend. And you absolutely have to drop everything to go save her right effing now. To be fair, her job does suck and her stepsisters are the worst… but seriously, girl. Take charge of your own life.

Anna: The Boy-Crazy Serial Dater

Yes, she’s on Tinder right now. Also she’s really sorry, but she’ll have to cancel on you, re: drinks tonight, even though you’ve been planning it forever, because that super cute guy at the coffee shop just asked her out.

Elsa: The Anger Taker-Outer

She’s angry. She’s not actually angry at you… but you happen to be the nearest target, so you get to bear the brunt of it. Sigh.

Belle: The “I Need a Project” Girl

And not just any project — she needs a guy to makeover. This time? It’s Wreck-It Ralph. Poor guy doesn’t know what he’s in for.

Pocahontas: The Health and Fitness Nut

Look, it’s fine if you don’t pollute your body with the processed grossness of pre-packaged granola bars, but seriously. Stop giving everyone else a hard time about the fact that they actually like the processed grossness of pre-packaged granola bars.

Not going to lie: Belle’s entry is my favorite. But not necessarily because of the jokes it makes about her — no, I just get a kick out of seeing which other Disney characters populate her and Laila’s office. The grand finale, of course, ends up being a huge song-and-dance number in the style of Chicago, and, well… let’s just say you won’t want to miss it. Check it out here:

Images: Carlos/Flickr; BuzzFeedVideo/YouTube (6)