Entertainment
11 Romantic Comedy Couples That Are Actually Way Creepy, When You Think About It
I love a good romance as much as the next person, but sometimes I worry that Hollywood's portrayal of a healthy relationship is a little, um, off. Sure, every onscreen relationship needs conflict, but I hope that most people would run far, far away from what some Hollywood films depict as a romantic struggle — because seriously, some of this stuff is just plain weird. Whether it's a grown guy hitting on a teenager or a couple using Whoopi Goldberg as their sexual proxy, here are the romantic relationships that were way weirder onscreen than we thought.
Image: Great American Films Limited Partnership
'Ghost' (1990)
For some baffling reason, Ghost was my favorite movie as a child. For the most part, it still holds up — except for one extremely awkward plot point, that is. Sam (Patrick Swayze) and his girlfriend Molly (Demi Moore) are desperate to reconnect after Sam is murdered. How do they do that? By Sam jumping into medium Oda Mae’s (Whoopi Goldberg) body and making out. Sure, we saw Sam onscreen, but let’s not forget who was really going at it.
Image: Paramount Pictures
'Twilight' (2008)
There have been plenty of essays written about how creepy the relationship between Bella and Edward is, but let’s start with the most obvious fact: Edward wants to kill Bella, pretty much 24/7. He wants to bite her neck, drink her blood, and ostensibly murder her. And this is disguised as romance.
Image: Summit Entertainment
'Never Been Kissed' (1999)
Don’t even try to tell me that high school teacher Sam (Michael Varton) wasn’t putting the moves on fake high school student Josie (Drew Barrymore) well before it was revealed that she was an undercover journalist. He was and it’s super gross, even if that ending on the baseball field — Josie finally gets a “real” kiss — is rather sweet.
Image: 20th Century Fox
'Dirty Dancing' (1987)
“Nobody puts Baby in the corner.” Really, Johnny? Because Baby was barely 17, and you were a full-blown adult with a job at a resort. And your sexy dance moves aren’t going to make Baby’s dad feel much better about your relationship.
Image: Vestron Pictures
'Her' (2013)
I can barely get Siri to set an alarm for me, so I was almost impressed that Theodore was able to cultivate a relationship with his own intelligent computer system Samantha. While I’m thrilled at Theodore’s mastery of technology, I don’t know if I’ll ever get over the fact he wanted to have sex with a voice on his computer… even if she did sound like Scarlett Johansson.
Image: Warner Bros.
'How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days' (2003)
I love this movie, mostly because Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey might be the most likable rom com couple of all time. Of course, their characters also happen to live in a world where it’s completely acceptable to use other people’s emotions for their own career gain — Andie (Hudson) is writing an article proving that she can get Ben (McConaughey) to dump her because “women be crazy,” and Ben bets that he can get Andie to fall head-over-heels for him so he can score an advertising account. Apparently what makes Andie and Ben perfect for one another is their ability to be soulless monsters — but what would have happened if they started dating literally anyone else?!
Image: Paramount Pictures
'50 First Dates' (2004)
Lucy (Drew Barrymore) has a crippling disability that prohibits her from forming new memories. Henry (Adam Sandler) is a reformed womanizer convinced that he can have a relationship with someone who forgets about him the next day. At the end of the film, Lucy has a five-year-old child with Henry and is sailing to Alaska — without any memory of the events leading up to it. (There’s actually a psychological thriller titled Before I Go To Sleep with the same plot. It seems like the more appropriate genre.)
Image: Columbia Pictures
'That Awkward Moment' (2014)
There are a few relationships in this film, but by far the most disturbing is the one between Jason (Zac Efron, whom deserves an apology from the writer for making his character a grade-A douchebag) and Ellie (Imogen Poots). Jason and Ellie have the whole meet-cute thing, go on a few dates, and sleep together (definitely not in that order) and things seem to be going fairly well. Then, Ellie’s father dies, and Jason refuses to go to the funeral. His reasoning? Going to Ellie’s father’s funeral would mean they were “serious.” (Because clearly Ellie’s father’s death was a ploy to trap Jason…?) The truly tragic part of this whole story is that Jason somehow wins Ellie back despite the fact that he is a total and complete dick.
Image: Focus Features
'Grease' (1978)
Danny (John Travolta) and Sandy (Olivia Newton John) are in love, but Danny won’t sacrifice his tough guy reputation to be with Sandy and Sandy doesn’t want to put out, so, obviously, they’re screwed. Except, wait! Sandy picks up a cigarette and slides into a pair of leather pants and suddenly they ride off into the sunset together on a flying car. Moral of the story: If your relationship isn’t working, you should probably change.
Image: Paramount Pictures
'Big' (1988)
12-year-old Josh gets his wish of magically aging to 30 overnight. The 30-year-old Josh (Tom Hanks) becomes a toy executive and falls for a woman named Susan (Elizabeth Perkins.) The photo above should really explain everything that is wrong with the romance in the film.
Image: 20th Century Fox
'Something Borrowed' (2011)
Rachel (Ginnifer Goodwin) has always secretly loved Dex (Colin Egglesfield) — too bad he’s now engaged to her BFF Darcy (Kate Hudson in an unusually villainous role). The movie attempts to manipulate you into thinking that Rachel and Dex’s secret affair is romantic as hell, but no matter how monstrous Darcy is, hooking up with your best friend’s guy is just plain awful.
Image: Warner Bros.
