Entertainment

Haven't They Been Engaged for a While Now?

by Arielle Dachille

You guys!! Kelso and Jackie had a baby last week! Life is HAPPENING!!! Now that the world has welcomed its first child that owes its existence to That '70s Show, this begs the question: When are Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher getting married? Inquiring minds who care too much about celebrity lives, like mine, want to know...

First of all, as a disclaimer, it's not like they need to be legally wed in order to raise a child together. I'm all for couples subverting the wedding-industrial complex. It's just that they've just been engaged since February and it seems like they'd throw a fun party. Plus, it would be great to see Kutcher reunite with his inner wedding emcee again, like he did when he stole the show at that Indian wedding.

Anyway, let's get down to sleuthing. Our sneaky old buddy "a source" told E! Online back in June that Kutcher and Kunis were planning to wait until after the arrival of their child to tie the knot. Reportedly, the pair is "not planning to get married before the baby is born" because "they have a lot going on right now." With moving into a new house together, prepping for parenthood, and, you know, their respective careers, the Two and a Half Men actor and the Black Swan actress don't have enough hours in their days to hire a caterer.

However, judging from social media, it looks like that had time to take in a baseball game.

It's safe to say that wedding planning hasn't really kicked into high gear yet, right? Well, it's hard to gather clues because their social media accounts don't provide us with much relevant information. Mila Kunis' Instagram has gone inactive, and she has neither Twitter or Facebook. While Kutcher has a Twitter, he's not sounding off about tasting wedding cake, or tweeting at any of his former That '70s Show co-stars to ask them to be groomsmen.

There is evidence, however, that the wedding party will have a That '70s Show contingent. Back in July, Perez Hilton reported that Laura Prepon would be a bridesmaid. Just for good measure, I've searched Prepon's Instagram for any confirmation like, I dunno, a dress fitting, a wedding shower mimosa, or a picture of her drinking out of bachelorette party-appropriate penis straws with Kunis. Sadly, I came up blank. However, I did find this throwback Thursday photo of Prepon and Danny Masterson for your viewing pleasure.

These friendships never die, guys.

According to The Huffington Post, the majority of American couples have engagements that last from 13 to 18 months. Kunis and Kutcher have been engaged for a very busy eight months now. Gauging things on that information alone, they could get married from any time in March to September of 2015. That would give them enough time to book a venue and coordinate all of the "big wedding" logistics if they desired to go that route. The fact that there's been talk of a wedding party makes it seem to me that this isn't going to be a City Hall wedding.

So let's assemble the wayward vestiges of kinda-information that we have. Kunis and Kutcher are supposedly waiting for their baby to arrive for their wedding, and that has happened. It looks like they haven't had too much time to plan things yet because they're both crazy busy. And, they aren't yet in the average engagement period.

Making an educated guess, I'd say that this pair is likely to get hitched some time in the late summer or fall of 2015. After all, they have their hands full with the new baby, and you know how August through October is always wedding season. Then again, I'm no Hogwarts professor of Divination, so don't quote me on that.

Images: Laura Prepon/Instagram; Giphy (2)