Possibly the Most Badass Way To Quit a Job

Ladies, more ladies and also some gentlemen (I see you, boo), please meet Charlo Greene. Greene has many traits and qualities (because she is a human being and that's what we do), but let's talk about the three that have me scribbling about her here today: She is a local news reporter in Alaska, a medical marijuana advocate, and a total bad-ass.

During Sunday night's news broadcast after reporting on a piece about medical marijuana and a local club in Alaska supporting its use, Greene revealed (*CUE SCARY AND DRAMATIC ORGAN MUSIC OF AN EARLY-ERA SOAP OPERA RADIO SHOW*) that she owned the club in question and that she was quitting to dedicate her time to the cause. With that, she gave a masterful shrug, dropped an F-bomb and sashayed away.

Side note: Can we talk about the deer-in-headlights look on the anchor's face as they cut back to her. She manages to apologize, which, you know, good for her. But it might have been a more effective apology had she also managed to remember to blink. Sadly, this was not to be.

The last time I quit my job I did it exactly the way you are supposed to. After making sure I had my new opportunity lined up, I requested a meeting with my boss where I explained that, while I'd learned a great deal, the time had come for me to move on. My boss was great about it. So were my co-workers. There was a lot of awkward hugging. On my last day we had pizza and I got a card that said stuff about "journeys." These are all things that I can guarantee you would not have happened if I'd stood up loudly in the middle of our staff meeting and been all "FUCK DIS" and then bolted from the room. Which is a pity really, because who hasn't secretly and desperately wanted to make a scene before peace-ing out forever?

Charlo Greene says that she quit with such viral aplomb to draw attention to her cause. She's definitely done that and while I'm sure the satisfaction was on par with perfectly separating an Oreo into three perfect pieces (cookie, cream, cookie, naturally), I don't know that this was the way to get people to be all "Yes! More pot! In Alaska! For health!" That said, if it does turn out to have that effect on folks: Charlo Greene for supreme master of the universe.

Image: Getty