Nick Cannon Is Confused

So you know how for the past two weeks or so reports have come out saying that Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey are separated? Well, Nick Cannon wants you to know that those reports are all . . . true. But they're also lies made up by the media! But, like, for real though, the media happened to be right on some points because they actually are separated. Basically, Nick Cannon is confused. To make his confusion clear to the world (and maybe to work out some personal issues publicly . . .) Nick Cannon went on a Twitter rant about Mariah Carey, their separation, and the media.

There are a few strange things about Cannon's tweets that make this whole thing not really add up:

1. Cannon says the media created stories about himself and Carey having issues with their "imagination" while still admitting that he and Carey are having issues.

2. Reportedly, Carey gave him a non-disclosure agreement in reference to talking about their split, and Cannon seems to be talking about the separation while saying that he isn't talking about the separation.

3. Nick Cannon's Twitter bio reads, "If you take anything I say on Twitter seriously, you have too much time on your hands. WHITE PEOPLE PARTY MUSIC in stores NOW!!!" Obviously, you can see where some confusion could be caused by that one.

Here's what Nick Cannon said and some of the problems that lie within these tweets:

"Nick Cannon" has been tweeting up a storm though. He has several tweets a day promoting America's Got Talent and his new book. Did he just admit his tweets are not always written by himself? Are THESE tweets written by Nick Cannon? Are there two Nick Cannons? Help!

*Feels guilty*

Cannon, allegedly, gave an interview to Yahoo! Insider on Aug. 21 during which he said, "There is trouble in paradise. We have been living in separate houses for a few months." I would call that forthcoming.

Because you aren't allowed to due to a non-disclosure agreement . . .? Also, THIS IS A STATEMENT. YOU ARE GIVING A STATEMENT.

Except that he and Carey are having issues, and he literally just said so himself.

I don't know if I missed something, but gossip sites are clearly gossip sites and every other source who has been reporting on this has been basing this on a quote that Cannon gave (the media in their imaginations).

Ditto.

Now this part is reasonable.

Speaking out is fine, it's just odd when you've (supposedly) already spoken out before.

That makes sense! Keep making sense, Nick!

I don't know that the media is necessarily painting him as "the bad guy," but if he's referring to the fact that he got all TMI about his sex life in (non-imaginary and with video footage) interviews and that this may have led to the divorce while Mariah Carey is a national treasure, then yes, maybe he is kind of being painted as the bad guy.

?

???

If you're going to comment on it (by not commenting on it . . .?), then come right out and say what you mean.

THE SOURCE WAS NICK CANNON.

OK, one of the sources was Nick Cannon and anyone with half a brain knows that all other anonymous sources have to be taken with a grain of salt.

T-shirt idea.

When I heard that Nick Cannon gave the "trouble in paradise" quote, I also had my doubts and I tried to reason out why Cannon might have used this phrasing. But then again, it's not like this quote came from the National Enquirer. Cannon is basically saying that Yahoo! Insider would have made up the quote which is a pretty large accusation. If it is true that Cannon didn't give the quote, then he would have the right to be upset. Still, a better place to handle this would be in court, rather than through Twitter posts.

. . .

And then "Nick Cannon" returned.

So what do we think, people? Cannon seems pretty all over the place in these tweets, but it's hard to really knock him if the "trouble in paradise" quote was made up because that was solid confirmation of the separation really happening. Either way, writing a bunch of tweets is not a great way to making the point that you aren't talking about something. Clearly. Because he is talking about it.

But hey, maybe his Twitter bio really is true and we just shouldn't take him seriously. I know personally I am totally fine with not taking Nick Cannon seriously.