Entertainment

Kate Revoked Pirate Scavenger Hunt Privileges

by Kristie Rohwedder

Last Tuesday's episode of Below Deck left the fate of a certain deckhand up in the sea air, and this Tuesday's episode cut right to the chase: Before the resumé embellisher could spend too much time struggling to lift a stack of empty buckets, Captain Lee sent Andrew packing. It’s a shame Andrew left before the next charter began, because he’d probably be 110% on board (sorry not sorry) with a guest straddling him as their bodies torpedoed down that inflatable yacht slide. Kelley could’ve used some backup. (MISS YOU ALREADY, ANDREW!)

After the essence of lavender extract compote squad vacated the yacht, primary charter guest Phoenix Area Nightclub Owner (I am from Phoenix, so my eyes locked in on that dossier detail. Didn't catch his name. Sorry), his companions, and their no-nonsense itinerary boarded the Ohana.

There was something about the group that Kate dug instantly (that "something": the group wasn't the essence of lavender extract compote group). When Kate met the new guests, she deemed them Pirate Scavenger Hunt-worthy, an activity she reserves for fun-loving, special guests. She looked past the guests getting testy about Ben prepping food according to Ben's schedule. She let the champagne bottle wrapper debacle roll off of her back. She was chill with the primary charter guest pulling her and Ben aside and reprimanding them. Kate especially loves the primary charter guest.

Excuse me, she loved the primary charter guest. Very past tense. It all changed the moment he took it upon himself to tell her to smile. He also told her she scares them and that she comes off "kinda bitchy":

AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Dammit, primary charter guest.

  1. You gave my girl Kate shit for not smiling. NOT COOL.
  2. You told my girl Kate she seems "kinda bitchy." NOT COOL.
  3. We'll never see the Pirate Scavenger Hunt. I was very intrigued by the Pirate Scavenger Hunt. AND NOW IT'S GONE. IT'S BEEN RIPPED OUT FROM UNDER US. NOT COOL.

You know what? Everything's going to be okay. BECAUSE NEXT WEEK IS DICK BLANKET WEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kate is my hero.

Image: Bravo; houseofmack, callum-struthers, your-reaction-gifs/tumbr