12 September 2013 Magazine Covers, Rated

Who? Zooey Deschanel

Was it a good choice? Absolutely. Deschanel is one of the few brunettes to grace a September cover this year, which is great, because — breaking news — there are people who don't have blonde hair. Plus, Deschanel seems like a genuinely kind and intelligent person, and provides a September profile worthy of reading.

How'd the cover turn out? The styling isn't groundbreaking, but it is emblematic of fall, which, really, isn't that what we all want in a September cover? If I were still in the stage of my life where I tore off magazine covers and pasted them around my room, this cover would certainly make the wall.

Overall Verdict: Solid styling, solid coverstar, solid use of pinkie rings. A win.

Who? One Direction

Was it a good choice? Was it a good choice to put One Direction on the cover of a teen magazine? What do you think? It's a match made in heaven (heaven, in this instance, is a white sand beach where Harry Styles whispers sweet nothings into your ear).

How'd the cover turn out? The one of the far left (Zane? Zoyan? Did someone name their kid Zoyan?) looks bored. The one next to him appears distracted. Harry Styles is working it. On Harry's Left lost his black jacket on the way to the shoot, and had to show up in a red knit. How embarrassing for you, On Harry's Left. I had no idea the one on the far right even existed until this photo. Is he even part of 1-D? Did this person win a content to appear on the Teen Vogue cover with One Direction? Maybe.

Overall Verdict: The cover is sort of a mess, but ultimately it doesn't matter, because it's still a teen magazine with One Direction on it. Still, nothing will top the One Direction puppy cover.

Who? Sarah Jessica Parker

Was it a good choice? Well, it was a safe choice, but it does illicit an, "Again? Really?" Listen, Sarah Jessica Parker is awesome, but how many times can we hear one person talk about "love and shoes?"

How'd the cover turn out? Parker looks pretty, sure, but it's a fair unoriginal cover. Gold. Shiny things. Great. Now, tells me more about that love and those shoes.

Overall Verdict: Not a disaster, but not a masterpiece. For the "Biggest Issue Ever," it's pretty unmemorable.

Who? Cara Delevingne

Was it a good choice? Oh, yeah. Nowadays celebrities almost exclusively grace magazine covers, but models used to run the cover game. W's September cover is reminiscent of those days without being in-your-face about the return of the supermodel. Also, finger tattoos of lions.

How'd the cover turn out? I'm not saying you should tear this cover off, tape it next to your mirror, and quietly intone, "I wish to have Cara Delevingne's eyebrows, but I am saying you could do that. Also, finger tattoos of lions.

Overall Verdict: It's not really representative of fall, but it's still a stunning cover, and it's nice to see a model on a magazine.

Who? Drew Barrymore

Was it a good choice? Drew Barrymore can do no wrong, so yes. (Don't you dare bring up Fifty First Dates. Don't you dare.) Barrymore has an almost-universal appeal, so, even if the styling looks like something the cool teacher in high school would wear (Ms. Barrymore wears Chanel, and everyone who takes her AP Gov. class gets a five), the cover works.

How'd the cover turn out? The styling is sort of questionable: Bangles! Statement earrings! Shiny fabric! Snake skin! Calm down there, InStyle.

Overall Verdict: This cover is saved by the power of Barrymore.

Who? Kate Upton

Was it a good choice? Eh. There's nothing wrong with choosing to go with Kate Upton, but why go the "Hello Sexy" route? Kate Upton is hot; we saw that GQ cover of her licking a popsicle. It would have been interesting to see Elle take a different approach with their cover star.

How'd the cover turn out? Upton looks undeniably stunning — like a modern day Jessica Rabbit. But, again, we're a little weary of the form-fitting, red dress with long, red nails and bombshell waves. Wait. Is Kate Upton sexy? Do tell me more.

Overall Verdict: Kate Upton is stunning, but it would have been nice to see Elle give a more original take on the model.

Who? Serena van der Blake Lively

Was it a good choice? It was maybe the safest choice in the September issue game, but for good reason. Why? This was Eva Chen's first issue as EIC of Lucky and Lively has a whole lot of appeal. Sure, people don't go crazy over the way they do over, say, Jennifer Lawrence, but she doesn't illicit hate the way other celebrities do.

How'd the cover turn out? It's a bit confusing. Lively is in a fall coat, but her makeup and hair make her look ready for summer. It's a nice cover, but there's nothing memorable about it, and it doesn't give the punch we expected from Chen's first cover.

Overall Verdict: Lively always looks beautiful. The cover took the safe route, but it makes sense why Chen wouldn't want to make a groundbreaking decision on her first cover.

Who? Jennifer Garner

Was it a good choice? It was a random choice. Sorry, but what has Jennifer Garner done in the past year to merit a September cover? That's not to say Garner isn't a lovely and talented person, but September covers should showcase celebrities with exciting projects coming up, or who have recently done something noteworthy.

How'd the cover turn out? It's simple and pretty. But a very genuine shoutout to Allure for not editing out her wrinkles.

Overall Verdict: Next time go for someone a big more interesting, Allure.

Who? Jennifer Lawrence

Was it a good choice? Was it ever! Find me a person who dislikes Jennifer Lawrence, and I will find you a robot.

How'd the cover turn out? Perfect. Badass. Stunning.

Overall Verdict: Jennifer Lawrence is our queen.

Who? Nina Dobrev

Was it a good choice? It was a very Cosmo choice, if nothing else. Sexy waves, cleavage, long legs. Yup. Sounds like Cosmo to me.

How'd the cover turn out? Girlfriend is in matching houndstooth dress and shoes. How could that possibly turn out well?

Overall Verdict: Next time, let's not do a houndstooth mini dress.

Who? Kristen Bell

Was it a good choice? Yes, yes, yes. A thousand times yes. Kristen Bell appears on the cover of Redbook looking like a real live human being. The Veronica Mars star has caught some heat for not losing her baby weight immediately, because, yep, that should be her number one priority as a new mother.

How'd the cover turn out? Kristen Bell looks adorable with her beachy waves and printed tops. However, I'm not crazy about how Redbook now puts products on their cover next to the coverstar.

Overall Verdict: Should have just been Kristen Bell. The Cookie Diet has no business being on a September cover.

Who? Jennifer Aniston

Was it a good choice? Yes, but another safe choice. Jennifer Aniston is another one of those celebrities that nobody really hates, because how can you? She's always charming in interviews, and seems like she doesn't take herself too seriously. Still, she's graced Glamour before, and it would have been refreshing to see the magazine do something new.

How'd the cover turn out? She looks pretty, but you've seen it before.

Overall Verdict: If you're going to do a safe cover star, at least do something interesting with her.