Hobbits > Sexism

It's probably safe to assume you haven't forgotten about that sexist Air New Zealand safety video featuring bikini models Chrissy Teigen and Jessica Gomes. While that one sparked controversy due to its overtly sexual content, the airline's latest safety video will surely extinguish any leftover heat... since it's basically the antithesis of sexy. Air New Zealand's latest safety video features hobbits and elves in a Lord of the Rings-inspired production that could have perhaps used more than just a cameo from director Peter Jackson.

The bikini safety video may have come off sexist, but at least it didn't look like it was costumed by Ricky's Halloween store.

The latest safety video, titled "An Unexpected Briefing" — based on Jackson's first film in his Hobbit trilogy, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey — is a promotional collaboration between Air New Zealand and the movie franchise, which makes sense because all three films were filmed in New Zealand (Jackson is a New Zealand native). Timing-wise, the video could be used to drum up some early buzz for the last Hobbit film, due out in December.

The airline has even rebranded its Boeing 737 jet the "Airline of Middle Earth." (If you're not familiar with the fantasy genre, Middle Earth is J.R.R. Tolkien's fictional universe where The Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings trilogies take place.) Many of the beloved creatures of Middle Earth appear in the video, although they're joined by totally regular people in jeans and plaid shirts. The overall result resembles more of an LOTR (please don't judge the nerdiness of my nonchalant shorthand) fan convention than a fantasy film. See for yourself.

The video starts out with an ethereal Elven flight attendant, who is perhaps based on Galadriel or Arwen, welcoming everyone aboard.

Her calm beauty and pointy ears entrance the passengers, who are made of a mix of Orcs, dwarves, other Elves, and...

...these guys.

And some passengers are a hybrid type thing, with hairy hobbit feet...

...but they look like members of the band Lit.

Gandalf, is that you??

Nope, it's just this guy in a wig and fake beard.

Oh, but look at those authentic-looking hobbits! It's beginning to feel like Middle Earth again.

Until we get to this guy, whose "Christian rock meets gambling bookie" look really confuses the senses.

He demonstrates what happens when you take off your seat belt mid-flight.

You get your hair dryer taken away.

Then the male Elf, who falls a bit short of resembling Orlando Bloom as Legolas, takes over and explains the oxygen masks.

Somewhere a Halloween megastore is running low on wigs.

The guy who also looks like a '70s organized crime underling shows us how to use the mask properly.

But don't forget that you should help yourself before helping others with their masks.

Another helpful guide is this totally normal-looking guy in a plaid shirt, who's probably on the wrong flight.

"I am definitely the most attractive person on this flight."

Surprise! It's Peter Jackson! He picks up the famed golden ring and says, "My precious," a nod to his films.

The video also shows passengers in Business Premiere how they should sit when bracing for impact. Apparently this guy is on an important business trip.

The owner of the largest Ford dealership in West Virginia demonstrates how to inflate the flotation devices and this girl is totally into it.

Wizards who are addicted to that pipe-weed (don't worry, kids, it's a made-up substance) will not be permitted to smoke anywhere in the aircraft. Sorry, fake Gandalf.

In the event of a power outage...

... pray that Gollum isn't on your flight...

... or fake Gollum. Would Gollum really wear a white t-shirt? Do you see what I mean about the video looking like a themed Halloween party?

Anyway, just make sure to power down your Middle Earth-made electronics.

Sit back and enjoy the flight.

Eve if you're invisible.

Images: Air New Zealand/YouTube