Lafayette Is Finally Getting a Real Story

Though the end is near, it's never too late to appreciate True Blood's Lafayette Reynolds as the brazen older brother you never had. He always provides you with a stash of illegal substances, gives great advice, helps you paint your nails, and looks better in your Levi jeans than you do. He puts together incredible flashy but eye-catching outfits that you could never pull off, and now he's stealing your boyfriend James right out from under your nose. Well.. he's not your boyfriend exactly.. he's Jess' but it's the principle of the thing. In reality, I'm not sure if Jess will care, considering I really think she's got something brewing with Adilyn this season.

Now while I may be jealous of Queen diva La La for snagging James, I couldn't think of anyone more deserving. Lafayette has really been through a lot over the past couple of seasons. Just like our girl Tara (rest her soul), Lafayette's boyfriend Jesus Velasquez died too because of all that scary witchcraft and magic the two of them were messing around with. It seems like Laf really can't catch a break. Your boyfriend is most likely a part of some weird cult, a vampire, a shapeshifter, a werewolf, or some crazy psycho murderer.

But the bad times are over and will be replaced with sexy James Lafayette times! I'm going to go on record and say this relationship will be good for Lafayette. We can only imagine what's in store for us now that this dynamic duo has joined forces (and they definitely will because James' original actor Luke Grimes left True Blood because he didn't want to engage in any gay love scenes). Rude.

Here's what we can expect more of now that James and Lafayette are becoming an item:

LOTS OF DANCING (POSSIBLY TOGETHER)

Lafayette dancing is one of my favorite things that happens on True Blood and once the James thing gets going, he'll have a lot to dance about. James is kind of a total smokeshow. I'm hoping James and La La start having dance battles at Lafayette's house. Plus, we can learn some moves to bust out at the next wedding we've got to go to. Everybody's tired of the Electric Slide, right?

Tandem Tripping Through Sexy Blood-Sucking (No, really)

James can't take pills, but Lafayette has found the perfect solution: He just pops a few and lets James suck his blood. How romantic! Bring it on, guys.

SEX SCENES... Please?

Of course, not much could top that Eric and Jason dream sex scene. Talk about streamy...

Awesome NEW CATCHPHRASES

Honestly, Lafayette has some of the greatest one-liners of any character on this show. Try and tell me that after hearing this exchange between La and James that you weren't absolutely obsessed with the phrase "Is you groovin' on me?"

I've already said it about 13 different times in about five different scenarios, and each time it probably wasn't relevant but I'm sorry, I'm obsessed.

MORE CONVERSATIONS ABOUT SEX

James may be Jess' boyfriend, but let's face it, vampires don't really have a sexual orientation. They're sort of interested in anyone that has a blood type. I think, because James is still with Jess, there will be a few more conversations about that relationship and maybe a bit of backstory about James. I'd love to see some flashbacks about his relationships while he was human. I need something to distract me from Bill's boring Civil War era flashbacks. You're telling me I've got to pay attention to something that's in black and white?

ALL IN ALL...

I'm waiting for my invitation to James and Laf's nuptials in the mail. Can you imagine what a fantastic wedding that would be? I bet RuPaul would show up and officiate the thing for goodness sake. Now that's a wedding I'd do the Electric Slide at.

Images: HBO (2); imhereforsookie/Tumblr (6); truebloodpics/Tumblr; AwesomelyLuvvie