He Won't "Get Her Back" This Way

If the rest of the songs off Paula are anything like this, then Robin Thicke and Paula Patton are 100 percent done. We knew that Thicke wasn't taking his separation from Patton very well, but, to be honest, the idea of him writing an entire album of songs about her was more creepy than it was cute. No means no, Thicke, and there are no "Blurred Lines" here. The first single off the Paula album is called "Get Her Back" and Thicke released a music video for the track. Honestly, we really wish he hadn't. Without context, "Get Her Back" could have been a pretty poignant lost love song. Now, I'll never be able to listen to it without wanting to lock all my windows and doors.

The entire video is done in black and white to reflect Thicke's obvious melancholy, although his baby blue eyes are in color. Interspersed between close-up shots of Thicke singing are flashes of a beautiful woman (obviously), water, fallen flowers, and other symbolic "I'm so sad, woe is me" kind of imagery. However, all of that pales in comparison to the iMessage speech bubbles that flash across the screen every few seconds.

"Get Her Back" opens on a white screen as a shadowy figure approaches and then up crops the message, "I kept trying to warn you you were pushing me too far..." Um, what? Thicke would be lucky if every woman watching didn't immediately close out of that window. In fact, I'm pretty sure that scene could describe at least seventeen horror movies that have come out since the 1980s.

The other iMessages range from things as innocuous as "I miss u" to things as obsessive as "Why Why Why Why Why???" There's even a delightful point where an iMessage cheerful states, "I hate myself" right after a shot of Thicke dunking his head underwater in a moment that makes it look like someone's holding him down there until he drowns. Between that and the cuts and bruises on Thicke's face, he's really trying to make us all understand how much he's hurting here.

However, the video would have been a lot more effective without all the iMessages flashing up. If Thicke collected a bunch of conversations between friends, or fans, and their exes to use for the video, then he probably should have done a better job blending them with the pictures so the overall effect was more sad than it is terrifying. If Thicke is airing his and Patton's dirty laundry by using their texts like this, then he's probably going to have to give up on any chance he had of getting her back before or after Paula comes out.

All in all, I think we've finally found a Robin Thicke song that makes us more uncomfortable than "Blurred Lines". None of us probably realized that "Blurred Lines" was setting a bar that Thicke would endeavor to surpass, but I suppose it's nice that he has goals. Watch the video below.

Image: Year of Halloween