Ariana's Big Brother Will Slay 'Big Brother'

"What's that?" I asked my web browser Thursday morning. "Did you say CBS announced the Big Brother 16 cast? TAKE ME TO IT." I typed and clicked and scrolled like a madwoman. In that moment, I didn't know why I was compelled to click so quickly, but I knew—for some reason—I needed to see the list. I sensed I would read something major. My gut didn’t lead me astray. For one contestant caught my attention as soon as the cast list pulled up: Frankie J. Grande. It was as if his name was the positive charge to my eyes’ negative charge. (Just hittin’ you with a little magnet science on a Thursday. CLASSIC KRISTIE.)

Oh my god. Ariana Grande's half-brother will be on Big Brother. This news is a big deal to this Arianator. I adore Ariana, duh, but I also adore Frankie. I am AMPED.

Do I think he’ll win Big Brother? Eh, he could. But I’m not a Big Brother strategist. I shouldn't make any predictions about who will and won't walk away with the cash prize. What I will predict: Knowing that he is smart, hilarious, and doesn't take himself too seriously, I can see Frankie being an entertaining and formidable opponent.

"What's he all about?" you ask. "What's his deal?"

Oh, I'll tell you what he's all about! Here are 11 tidbits about Frankie you should know before the sixteenth season of the reality show premieres on June 25:

He’s Ariana Grande’s Half-Brother

Yes, we already knew that. But I don't care. It's just so good. They're so good.

AUGHHHHHHHH I WANT TO BE THEIR HALF-SISTER.

He’s A Broadway Guy

He was in Mamma Mia!, and he produced Broadway productions of Hamlet, La Bete, and Born Yesterday.

He's a YouTube Personality

He has over 188,000 followers. And yes, Ariana appears in some of the videos.

He’s A Bug Nerd

He studied biology in college, with a focus on entomology. HE KNOWS EVERYTHING ABOUT BUGS.

He’s No Underachiever

He didn't stop at the bug degree: He tacked on not one, but two additional majors. While attending Muhlenberg College, Frankie majored in biology, dance, and theater.

He Knows What's What

He Started a Charity

He cofounded Broadway in South Africa, an empowerment-through-performance program.

He’s A Reality TV Fanatic

He watches a lot of reality TV. He's done his homework.

He Can Dance

He's Hilarious

If you check out his YouTube channel, you'll probably find yourself smiling. He's a high-energy, silly, funny dude. And he's Ariana-endorsed:

He’s Down To Take His Top Off

If you check out his YouTube channel, you'll also see a lot of shirtless Frankie.

Will I be rooting for Frankie while he's on Big Brother? Uh, did you really have to ask?

Images: nickelodeonkids/tumblr; ariana-glory/tumblr