Entertainment

What Blair Thinks Of the Asymmetrical Man Thong

by Lia Beck

June 19, 2014

Earlier this week news broke of a male garment the likes of which the world had never seen before: the asymmetrical man thong. (Well, unless any very crafty men fashioned them for themselves prior to this.) The asymmetrical man thong is exactly what it sounds like. The thong has only one side strap to it and through the perfect combination of asscheek and bulge force, somehow it stays in place. There's also a covered wire involved that helps keep a man's business from popping out.

Now that you know the "how" of the asymmetrical man thong, you're probably wondering about the "why" and, frankly, who the hell knows. To avoid tan lines? But on only one side of your waist? Honestly, there might be more information hidden somewhere on the A.M.T.'s Amazon page, but I could not stand more than a quick perusal. The photos are too much to handle — as in, I start laughing uncontrollably — and I'm already paranoid about my coworkers looking over and seeing barely covered man parts on my computer screen. (If this is something you're worried about too, then don't scroll down.)

For this week's character reaction installment, was there really an option other than the asymmetrical man thong? Yeah, the World Cup is a pretty big deal right now, but this is an asymmetrical man thong. As for who is reacting to this marvel of underwear (swimwear?), it's Gossip Girl's Blair Waldorf because she makes a fantastic disapproving face.

But first! You need to see the A.M.T. My apologies, but we cannot continue on without proof of its existence.