You'll Need This to Watch 'TFIOS'

If The Fault in Our Stars is any indication, Hollywood really, really hates it when any of us are happy. The film premieres in the United States on Friday and already it promises to be one of the biggest tearjerkers in history. It's a cancer love story that's about so much more than just cancer and Shailene Woodley and Ansel Elgort have done more than enough to assure us that they are going to do a phenomenal job of bringing Hazel Grace and Augustus Waters to life. Although The Fault in Our Stars promotional tour has taught us a lot more about Shailene Woodley than any of us really wanted to know — like that Woodley's "accidental incest" with Elgort really helped their romantic chemistry — but despite that, or because of that, we're all going to buy a ticket. Don't deny it.

However, those who are planning to flock to the theater over the weekend should make sure that they properly prepare themselves first. By Monday, we'll all have learned that we can divide our lives into before we saw The Fault in Our Stars and after we saw The Fault in Our Stars. To make the transition from one time period to the other a little easier, everyone should make sure that they bring at least one of the following seven items with them to see the movie.

1. A Friend

The Fault in Our Stars is about all kinds of bonds and friendship is just one of the many. Although the trailers have focused on Hazel and August's relationship, the two of them don't live in a bubble. They have a support group of strong friends that will make you appreciate your own. Besides, someone needs to hold you while you cry.

2. Tissues

Did we mention the crying? Because you'll definitely be crying. In fact, anyone who does not come out of the theater crying should probably be arrested on suspicion of being a robot or an alien in capable of human emotion. Make sure you bring as many boxes of Kleenex as you can carry in your hands.

3. A Date

If it wasn't for the cancer, The Fault in Our Stars would be a fairly typical teen love story. Hazel and August are an inspiration, so bringing a date along to the movie would be a good idea. You'd get to watch a romance and have a lot of other things to talk about as you walk out.

4. An Imperial Affliction

Surely, you can't be thinking of going to see The Fault in Our Stars without Hazel's favorite book, can you? Who cares if it's fictional? Bring along the excerpts from the fake novel that are present in the real novel so you can read along with Hazel and August. Or just a book with a cover that says An Imperial Affliction. Whatever works.

5. Trophies

If you didn't catch the clip shared on The Tonight Show, no one blames you. We did learn at the same time that Ansel Elgort can tap dance, after all. However, in the clip, Isaac starts smashing trophies in Gus' room after his girlfriend dumps him, which seems like a good time to go all Rocky Horror Picture Show and start breaking trophies in the theater.

6. A Sense of Humor

If there's one thing that Hazel Grace is known for, it's her snarky sense of humor. It ranges from the sarcastic to the deadpan to the blackest of humor, so you shouldn't be afraid to laugh along with her. Just because she has cancer doesn't mean there's nothing funny about the situations she gets into.

7. A Fan

Ansel Elgort is in this movie. I say again, Ansel Elgort is in this movie. Not only that, but we get a lovely, romantic scene of Hazel losing her virginity to August — which means Ansel Elgort gets shirtless in this movie. Bring a fan to keep yourself calm. Or for someone to revive you with when you pass out. Which leads us to a bonus item...

8. No, Seriously, Tissues

I can't stress this point enough. You will cry. You. Will. Cry. You've been warned.

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