Life

Never, Ever Ask Your Date These Questions

by Lucia Peters

How to handle yourself on a first date can be tricky; even determining whether or not you’re on a date in the first place is apparently up for debate a frightening amount of time. But in spite of all that ambiguity, you’d think that certain pieces of etiquette would always apply, right? Like, for instance, not physically touching people you don’t know terribly well unless you’re informed that it’s okay to do so? Or, say, asking super intrusive questions, the answers to which are none of your beeswax? Well, evidently this isn’t the case—or at least, it isn’t according to last night’s “What is the worst possible question to ask someone on a first date?” AskReddit thread.

Sure, there are a lot of jokey responses in there—but there are also a disturbing amount of true stories concerning people asking their dates everything from the number of sexual partners they’ve had to what they do with their body hair. So not okay. Here are the most cringeworthy of the bunch; if this roundup won’t stop people from asking questions like these, at least they can help you be prepared for the next time you find yourself on a hellish first date:

1. Certain Questions About Food Consumption

To which the correct response would be:

2. Pregnancy Inquiries

It is never okay to ask something like this. Seriously. Who does that?!

3. Your “Number”

None of your damn business, thank you very much.

4. This:

Religion is usually a no-no as a first date topic. So are kids. Religion and kids? Definitely not okay. Luckily, though, Lord_Bob has just the solution, should you find yourself in a situation like this:

5. Multi-Level Marketing Scheme Pitches

RUN! IT’S AN AMWAY PERSON!

6. “What’s Wrong With You?”

I’m willing to let this one slide for now, because drewba was 17 when the question was asked. Anyone older than that, however, should know that this will always sound offensive on a date. Always.

7. Questions About Personal Grooming Habits

I can’t believe people actually ask things like this. Seriously? I mean… seriously?!

8. Questions About Personal Anatomy

Like so many of these questions, there aren't really any social situations in which this would be acceptable to ask.

9. The Buffalo Bill Query

Although I suppose at least if your date does ask this, you know to GTFO. Immediately.

10. Requesting a Set-Up

Same goes for friend, cousin, etc.

BONUS!

On the other hand, something like this is totally acceptable:

I'm not thehonestyfish's fiancée, but I would definitely date someone who asked that question. Because that's awesome.