You Wanna Be A Guest At The Kimye Wedding

Can the Kimye wedding just happen already? The rumors are getting confusing and as someone whose job description includes keeping up with the Kimye wedding — it's between "know the difference between 'your' and 'you're'" and "familiarity with all the Real Housewives" — I'm starting to get fed up. Is it really happening in May? Are we one-hundred percent sure that it's not going to be at Versailles? Did my wedding invitation get lost in the mail? Things are getting really tough here and now there's a new rumor added into the mix. Reportedly, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are spending $125,000 per guest for their upcoming nuptials. How is that even possible?! That is $25 million altogether spent only on wedding guests.

Conveniently, some evidence for how this is possible is included in the report and it is just the kind of lavishness that will further confuse you. You'll think, "No, this has to be made up, no one would do that." But then you'll think, "Except Kim Kardashian and Kanye West." According to Grazia UK, there will be 200 wedding guests for the ceremony which will take place at the Trianon Palace Hotel in Paris. Each of these guest received a wedding invitation worth about $1000 each. According to a source who spoke with the magazine,

Kim and Kanye wanted the invites to be as lavish as possible and commissioned a couture designer to create gold silk boxes containing a photo album of their fairytale romance and a silk invite etched in real gold leaf with a clasp of natural pearls.

I need one of these. And then I immediately need to sell it on eBay to fund my own Paris trip.

A $1,000 invitation is nothing if they're spending $125K on each guest. Where does the rest of the money come from? The party favors is one place.

Guests will be greeted with goodie bags containing $500 bottles of Bollinger champagne, $200 Creme de la Mer products, handmade souvenir trinkets with Kim and Kanye’s initials etched in Swarovski crystals, bottles of scent from local perfumeries, and $250 vouchers for treatments at the hotel spa.

Even still, this wouldn't reach a quarter of a million dollars, so I'm thinking that comes in the form of the food and drink. (And the designer outfits everyone will to be forced to wear..? I mean really, that is sooo much money.) There isn't going to be any bottom shelf liquor at this wedding is what I'm saying and I think it's safe to guess that Burger King won't actually be catering.