Having sex doggy style is a naturally sexy position and it's one of my favorites. It's animalistic, there's a lot of penetration, and you can mix it up. Plus, it's basically a workout without you even trying. "We naturally tighten the core in this position — it is almost a natural reaction — so the core gets that workout," relationship expert, psychologist Nikki Martinez tells Bustle. Great stuff, right? But the truth is, even the sexiest positions can get dull. And, at least in my experience, doggy can get dull for the woman. When it's done badly — or just too often— you are there on your hands and knees and it can feel like your partner's just thudding away. Not sexy. If it's feeling lackluster, it can affect you both.
"A relationship is like a bicycle, when one of the wheels is flat, it will still go, but not well," Eric Marlowe Garrison, sex and relationship counselor, and author of the book Mastering Multiple Position Sex tells Bustle. "Even if only one partner is in that sex rut, it's going to affect the relationship sexually. When you need something that your partner doesn’t need, it's difficult to understand why they don't need it.”
So if you're looking for ways to spice up this position don't be shy. Luckily, all of these are great for a partner too, so I'm sure they won't mind you taking it up a notch. So here are seven tips for making doggy style even hotter:
1. Take Control
Just because your partner's in the default dominant position, doesn't mean it has to stay that way. Have them stay still while you move your hips forward and back, controlling the pace before they get to move again. The anticipation will drive them nuts and you'll feel more of a sense of control in a position that can generally be really submissive for you. You can try mixing it by taking turns back and forth.
2. Add A Toy
Still need to take it up a notch? It's the perfect position to use a vibrator. But you don't need to go out of your way to get it if you already own one — anything you've got in the top drawer will do. Combined with the deep penetration, it'll blow your mind.
As sex therapist Vanessa Marin writes for Bustle:
This is a great position for a larger toy, since it won’t “get in the way” like it might have in Missionary or other positions. Or you can look for something small that fits into your hand easily, like the LELO Lily. You can hold the vibrator against your clitoris with one hand, and use the other hand to help herself stay propped up. Or you can go down to one elbow, to make balancing a little easier. You can even have your partner reach around and use the toy on you.
3. Go For Clit Play
You don't need both of your arms to hold you up, so take matters into your own hands and use one of them for clit stimulation. Or let your partner go for it — if their arms are on the short side, they can lean forward and down which will also give you a sense of intimacy. Either way, make sure your clit is getting some attention.
4. Switch Up The Legs
The closer you get your legs together, the tighter the fit will be. Try moving your legs as close together as you can and, if your bodies allow for it, you can even cross one knee over the other. It's a totally new experience and super hot.
5. Collapse It
I'm evangelical about modified doggy, it's all the best parts of doggy but with more body contact and better for dirty talk. "Lie flat on your stomach, legs together," Jessica Drake, adult performer and sex educator, tells Bustle. "Same amazingly tight friction as 'special' missionary, and depending on the size/shape of your partner, possible G-spot stimulation." If you're uncomfortable try a pillow under your hips— it's like a whole new position.
6. Lube, Lube, Lube
Having trouble getting the fit right with your legs crossed? Or just want to add a different element? Lube will let you experiment with all the doggy options and just make everything feel incredible.
7. Try A Spank
It's not for everyone's taste, but even the more vanilla among us can be partial to a light slap on the ass. It doesn't have to actually hurt — and it definitely shouldn't if you're experimenting with it for the first time— but there's no better position to try it than doggy. I mean, it's all about the butt, so as long as you feel comfortable you might as well go for it. Just start lightly and work your way up.
Images: Caroline Wurtzel/Bustle; Giphy (7)
