These '90s Slang Words Were So Annoying

If anything makes me feel like an old fart, it's having to Google today's slang so I know what people are talking about. And when I experience the sudden realization that "AF" is an acronym and not the made-up word "af," I think, "This is preposterous." But to be fair, growing up, we had our own pieces of '90s slang that were really, really annoying. They were cool at the time, though, right? Actually, in retrospect, they probably sounded ridiculous AF back then, too. But we wanted to fit in, myself included, and, well... there you have it.

It's scientific fact (except not really) that the '90s were the best years ever. Having grown up in the decade, I can vouch for this. However, I'm also a writer, bookworm, and grammar nerd; therefore, nothing gives me cramps quite like nonsensical slang. Admittedly, it's part of what makes each decade and age group so unique. But... AF? Really, guys?

If I could time travel back to the '90s, there are many things I'd happily bring back with me to the present day. I'd gladly relive the years of Doug, milky pens, and scrunchies. But all of these slang words and phrases, I just... I just don't know what we were thinking.

1. All That And A Bag Of Chips

I always heard this more as an insult — a person calling out someone else for thinking they're the shiznit. Joke's on you, buddy. I love chips. Especially ones of the cheese variety. If you really wanted to hurt my feelers, you'd call me something I hate or I'm allergic to, like "all that and a red bell pepper."

2. Eat My Shorts

This was the "screw you" of the '90s, except all I think about is the horrific gastrointestinal ramifications that would follow.

3. Talk To The Hand

The human hand contains 27 bones, and nothing makes me want to break every single one of them more then when someone sticks their hand in my face and says, "Cuz the face ain't listening!"

4. Hella

We used this as another way to say "very" or "a lot," as in, "This slang is hella stupid." I only include it because it has recently experienced a resurgence, and young folk are trying to rebrand it as "hecka." No. No you may not.

5. Da Bomb

Something was "da bomb" when it was really cool or the best. But how much time did we really think we were saving ourselves by shortening the word "the" to two letters? Not sure how I ever said this with a straight face...

6. Bling Bling

People used this word instead of "jewelry," except I typically just assumed there was a phone ringing somewhere.

7. What's Crackalackin?

Really, all of these extra letters are unnecessary considering you're just asking what someone's up to.

8. Who's Your Daddy?

... Sam. He's a pharmacist. What about him?

This phrase, commonly used to brag about being better than someone, never should have happened and generally just makes me uncomfortable.

9. Cut... It... Out...

Uncle Joey coined this phrase on Full House, doing coordinating hand gestures. It was cute, but the audience reaction was slightly excessive. They'd explode in a burst of laughter, like, "ROFLCOPTER, Uncle Joey! You should be on SNL!"

10. Home Skillet

This was another way for people to address their friends, but the only skillets I know of come from Williams-Sonoma.

11. Cheddar

Cheddar was slang for money. Considering America's obsession with cheese, I think we all probably secretly hoped that a person with a lot of cheddar, had a lot of actual cheddar. Because heck yes.

12. Icing My Grill

If this has nothing to do with cake or barbecued hot dogs, I'll hear no more. (FYI: It's went you stare very intensely at someone, for reasons good or bad. So, no hot dogs for you.)

13. Raise The Roof

I'd love to, but our HOA doesn't allow major renovations. Oh! Oh, I'm sorry. You just meant we were making a lot of noise at our party in a joyous manner. Obviously.

14. What's The 411?

This one was irritating for one reason: It made perfect sense. We used to dial 4-1-1 for the local directory assistance. Good job, '90s slang! You got something right!

15. Dank

This slang term had a few different meanings. It was frequently used to describe something of good quality, but I'm still stuck on Urban Dictionary's definition of "sticky, hairy, stinky, and highly potent marijuana." I didn't even know marijuana could be hairy.

16. Booyah

"Booyah!" was an exclamation of joy, triumph, or happiness. It kind of reminds me of Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century's "Cetus-Lupeedus," where you don't have the slightest clue what you're saying but it sounds good anyway, so you just say it and hope no one asks questions.

Images: 20th Century Fox; Giphy (16)