John Oliver Has Advice For Americans After Brexit

Brits have spent decades looking down their noses at American politics — and oftentimes rightfully so. That's basically Last Week Tonight's premise. The former colonies make a mockery of the democracy we fought (them) so hard for, and John Oliver points it out. But no longer. As The New Yorker's Borowitz Report pointed out — as did many a meme rounding Twitter — "British Lose Right to Claim That Americans Are Dumber." Sorry, John. But wait! There's the real chance that we could join the U.K. and vote idiotically — and thus John Oliver has some post-Brexit advice for America.

Basically don't be so smug, because Donald Trump could happen:

You might think, "Well, that is not going to happen to us in America. We're not going to listen to some ridiculously haired buffoon peddling lies and nativism in the hopes of riding a protest vote into power." Well, let Britain tell you it can happen, and when it does, there are no f***ing do-overs.

Oliver has a point. The U.K's "shaved orangutan with Owen Wilson's hair" was Boris Johnson, one of the big politicians supporting the "Leave" campaign — and yet Trump's hair (and policies) are even worse. So it's very important that everyone realize what they're getting into. After the Brexit vote, some of the top Google searches in Britain were "What does it mean to leave the EU?" and "What is the EU?" Seriously. Please let's not be Googling "Who is Donald Trump?" or "What is fascism?" on Nov. 9.

Based on the post-Brexit interviews in the U.K., some voters voted to leave without ever entertaining the idea that it could truly happen. Now as Oliver put it, they seem "to have buyers remorse." One voter interviewed on ITV put it this way: "I was really disappointed about the results. Even though I voted to leave, this morning I woke up and ... the reality did actually hit me. But if I had the opportunity to vote again, it would be to stay," the woman said from Manchester Airport.

Oliver had good news (sarcasm) for the woman:

You're actually in luck because it turns out incredibly there is going to be another vote coming up. And it's coming up one week from — OF COURSE THERE ISN'T! THAT WAS THE F***ING VOTE! IT WASN'T A PRACTICE VOTE! THAT WAS IT!

Americans, do you hear that? The November vote will be final, too. And if you have any doubts about whether a Trump presidency would be absolutely terrible, read what Trump said in Scotland the morning after the Brexit vote:

I think it's going to end up being a great thing, and the beautiful, beautiful, beautiful thing is your people have taken the country back, and there's something very, very nice about that. And they voted and it's been peaceful ,and it was strong and very contentious. And in many respects — I watched last night — it was a little bit ugly. But it's been an amazing process to watch.

In other words, as Oliver pointed out, "He just said absolutely nothing":

First, he said a Brexit will end up being great, which it very likely won't. Then he said the word "beautiful" three times. Then he said, "Your people have taken the country back," even though he was in Scotland, which voted overwhelmingly to remain in the EU. Then he said it's been peaceful, which it absolutely hasn't. Then he immediately contradicted himself by saying it's been contentious and ugly. Then he summed the whole thing up as, "Amazing!" Now, if he had simply breathed audibly into the microphone, the same amount of information would have been conveyed.

Then he made it about himself on Twitter: "Many people are equating BREXIT, and what is going on in Great Britain, with what is happening in the U.S. People want their country back!" he tweeted. So, Trump has made the connection, and is predicting a win for himself. Take the threat seriously, vote in November, and prove Trump wrong. Because as Oliver said, "There are no f***ing do-overs!"