Kindness, communication, mutual respect, great sex — is this how you tell your compatible? Or is there a higher calling, a more basic truth, that gives you an innate sense of belonging — that lets you know you've found the one? There is, and a burrito dating site called Burrit-OH! is here to help you find it. Burrit-OH! won't match you on age, location, religion, interests, or life goals, it'll match you on burrito compatibility.
That's right — a dating site based off of the one thing you really care about. Black beans or pinto. Cheese and sour cream. The big questions. And don't even get me started on guac. We know it's the stuff of dreams; maybe it's the stuff of love as well.
The site, which launches today in honor of April Fool's Day, will be up through National Burrito Day (April 4) until April 8. So it's temporarily real, but I am I the only one who sort of wishes it was real forever? I mean, I'm not saying I would definitely lay my entire romantic future on a burrito dating site. But I'm saying I would probably lay my entire romantic future on a burrito dating site.
It's brought to you by the people at the dating site Zoosk and you can actually sign up and give it a try over at the Burrit-OH! site. According to a press release, they really went deep at Burrito-OH!.
“There were a lot of times where we had to stop and ask some hard questions,” explained Charmagne Kringstein, the UX Manager responsible for the user interface of Burrit-OH!. “Questions like, ‘Are there enough burritos in this screen? Can we put more emphasis on the burritos?’ or ‘How do we make this interaction more burrito-y?’"
These are questions I ask myself every day. Every. Damn. Day.
And, taking the lead of more traditional dating sites, they even explain how they get you your burrito matches:
Burrit-OH!’s 32 Ingredients™ framework calculates matches using real math (Not fake math like means or averages, which are basically just a fancy way of saying you’re guessing.). Burrit-OH! uses the cool math like algorithms; formulas; addition and subtraction; the Pythagorean theorem; sine, cosine, and tangent; and even that weird one with -b and the ± square root in it.
The quadratic equation, Burrit-OH!, you're talking about the quadratic equation. Take it from a high schooler who got math way more than I got laid.
Here's a sneak peak at what it looks like:
Important Math:
Burritos = Love is some math that everyone can get on board with.
Spicy!
I bet that's not the only thing you like you double wrap, Death2Tacoz. (I have no idea what that's implying.) But you have to love a man who doesn't care that guac costs extra.
TRUTH
Although my favorite part was the option if you're more of a taco lover, if you click on that option here's what you get:
You get the freaking truth. The site is live until April 8, so I highly recommend you trying it out if you're not participating in App-less April.
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Images: Burrit-OH!