Entertainment

Zayn Malik's New Album Is So Relatable... Totally

by Mary Grace Garis

A full calendar year after Zayn Malik left One Direction (as the #1YearWithoutZayn hashtag so kindly points out), the boy has emerged a man. Yes, at long last, Zayn's Mind of Mine debuted Friday, his long-anticipated first solo record... and it may actually be kind of good? I mean, I'll be honest, it's not my usual type of music, so I didn't think I'd be into it — but I have to admit, it has its merits. For instance: If you are to comb through the album, Mind of Mine has lyrics appropriate for every life situation... indie cred be damned.

OK, there are plenty of things that I find unrelateable about Zayn's latest project. For example, I don't spell my wOrDs LiKe tHis. From the get-go, that is something I will never understand, lest it's some post-boy band move to be edgy. You do you, Zayn. You do you.

Other than that, though, Zayn's debut has some lines that pretty much everyone can relate to... if you really put your mind to it. Don't believe me? Check out these lyrics from Mind of Mine that are totally perfect for everyday situations.

1. "So We'll Piss Off The Neighbors/ In The Place That Feels The Tears/ The Place To Lose Your Fears/ Yeah, Reckless Behavior"

When the crazy old lady who lives above from you always decides to vacuum at 6 a.m. on a Saturday, so you decide to have an egregiously loud bangfest in the middle of the night to get back at her.

2. "So Dirty And Raw/ Be In The Bed All Day, Bed All Day, Bed All Day"

When you don't have anyone to partake in an egregiously loud bangfest with or a neighbor who vacuums at ridiculous hours, you can sleep in on Sundays in the beautiful room that you haven't cleaned in three months.

3. "So Say What You Wanna Say, What You Wanna/ So Say What You Wanna Say, What You Gotta Say, Now/ So Say What You Wanna Say, What You Want/ Shame Is You Won't Say That To My Face"

When you go to your hometown bar during Easter weekend confront the your former high school frenemy about some rumors she started back in 11th grade.

4. "She Looks At Me Like She's Waiting/ Making Time Go Slow When They Show Her The Table"

When your friend get super annoyed that there's a wait at this restaurant you guys are at, so when the hostess finally leads you guys to your booth, she drags her feet along. Like, come on, don't be an jerk.

5. "I Don't Drink To Get Drunk/ I Feel All The Right Funk"

When you totally drank enough to get drunk at your cousin's wedding and your aunt asked if you were OK on the dance floor. I'm totally fine, I'm totally sober, this full body seizure is just me having an appropriate reaction to Katy Perry's "Roar."

6. "Right Now I Can't See Straight/ Intoxicated It's True/ When I'm With You"

When it's your birthday and people are buying you shots and you are really feeling it.

7. Heard About All The Miles You've Gone/ Just To Start Again/ Heard About All That You've Been Through/ It Sounds Like You Need A Friend"

When — SHOCKER — your best friend's move to Portland with her boyfriend didn't work out, so you're now picking up the pieces and holding back from spouting a thousand "I told you so"s.

8. "You’re Looking In The Wrong Place For My Love/ Don’t Think Because You’re With Me This Is Real"

When someone interprets a 3 a.m. Taco Bell run as something more than a quest to get quesalupas.

9. "This Love Is Tainted/ I Need You And I Hate It"

This one is actually about quesalupas.

10. "We're Off Where The Wind Blows/ I Don't Care Where We Go"

When it literally doesn't even matter where you have your lunch break anymore, you just need to get out of the office.

11. "Take It Off, Take It Off, Take It Off, Baby Just Take It Off/ Take It Off, Take It Off, Take It Off, Baby Just Take It Off"

"Madison, I say this as a friend, you cannot wear that shirt out tonight."

OK, I guess upon further inspection, you really do have to completely repurpose these lyrics do make them applicable to daily life situations, because all Zayn is really talking about is having adult sex with women. Still, it's worth the listen!

Images: Giphy (11)