Your 'Legally Blonde' Fave Says A Lot About You

Once upon a time, someone said, “When you watch 2001 film Legally Blonde , it is almost as if you are staring directly into the deepest part of your own soul.” And by “once upon a time,” I mean “a mere few seconds ago.” And by “someone,” I mean “Kristie Rohwedder.” And yes, by "Legally Blonde," I do mean the classic early aughts comedy about a marabou pen-toting sorority girl's Harvard Law adventures. Stay with me, OK? I sincerely believe you can learn a lot about yourself by simply posing the following question to your own reflection: Who is your favorite Legally Blonde character? You’ve had 15 years to meditate on the question, so I would assume you have your answer by now. If not, I will give you a second to ruminate.

Have you landed on your pick? Awesome! Content with your choice? Great! Ready for the next step? OK! The time has come. Let us unpack what your favorite Legally Blonde character says about you. (Side note: If your pick did not make the list, please know that from the bottom of my silver Tiffany & Co. heart necklace, I am sorry.)

If Elle Woods Is Your Favorite Character, That Means...

Many years ago, you noticed a rather attractive person while you were perusing the Macy’s housewares department. Before you could stop yourself, you found yourself doing the Bend and Snap in the middle of the Martha Stewart Home Collection aisle. The attractive shopper noticed. You and that attractive shopper are now happily married. You thanked Elle Woods in your wedding vows.

Oh, and you are 100% opposed to chafing.

If Bruiser Woods Is Your Favorite Character, That Means...

You’d never admit it out loud, but you’ve always secretly preferred Legally Blonde 2: Red, White, & Blonde to the first Legally Blonde movie. Why? Because there’s more Bruiser, doye.

If Margot & Serena Are Your Favorite Characters, That Means...

You've worn the same hair tie around your wrist ever since you got a 5 on your AP World History exam. You're reluctant to remove it because you've convinced yourself that it brings you luck, and that its absence brings you bad luck. Anytime anyone asks to borrow a hair tie, you say, "Oh, you don't want to use this thing. It isn't a hair tie. It's a black rubber band. It'll tangle your hair up in knots." You feel sort of bad, but you don't want to run the risk of losing the lucky hair tie. Of course, you're always happy to loan it to a friend in need.

If Warner Huntington III Is Your Favorite Character, That Means...

Wait, is Warner Huntington III really your favorite character? Seriously? Out of all of the characters this movie has to offer, you pick the rude dude with the nice sweater collection? Oh. OK, then.

So what does that say about you? Um, that you can’t resist a good knit sweater, I guess…?

If Vivian Kensington Is Your Favorite Character, That Means...

You love a heel-face turn story. You wholeheartedly believe that Vivian Kensington would make a great pro wrestling character.

If Brooke Taylor-Windham Is Your Favorite Character, That Means...

You take keeping secrets extremely seriously. Your friends know they can trust you with their secrets. If you have a secret, there is nothing—and I mean nothing—that will make you open up that vault and release the secret into the ether. Not even the threat of going to jail for a murder you did not commit.

If Emmett Richmond Is Your Favorite Character, That Means...

You are a nice person and/or appreciate nice people.

If Dorky David Kidney Is Your Favorite Character, That Means...

You are a nice person and/or appreciate nice people and/or are never not without dewormer.

If The UPS Delivery Guy Is Your Favorite Character, That Means...

You wish you were the object of his affection, i.e., you wish you were Paulette. Which, hey, I don't blame you; Paulette is amazing.

If Paulette Bonafonté Is Your Favorite Character, That Means...

Paulette is without a doubt the best character in the movie, so you clearly have A+ taste in fictional characters. You win. Congratulations.

Go ahead and do a round of Bend and Snaps to celebrate. You deserve it.

Images: MGM (4); iamdominiquegrace, teenvogue, brownpaperbag123, xwg, csce, theroguefeminist, prettynerdieworks/tumblr