The formula for typical holiday festivity goes something like this: Elf in bed with a mug of apple cider, icing gingerbread houses, and of course — figuring out where to buy a ugly Christmas sweater at the last minute for the inevitable themed party. Time to get your knit game on.
At this rate, "ugly Christmas sweater" has become equivalent to key December phrases like "Starbucks Peppermint Mocha" and "lazy Sunday mornings." The only difference? Ugly Christmas sweaters have transcended beyond being unflattering, once-a-year knits. From pop culture-friendly holiday sweaters (Seth Cohen! Will Smith!) to everything Star Wars (R2D2 in Christmas lights! Gingerbread Yoda!), there is bound to be the perfect "ugly" sweater for every personality.
But then the unthinkable strikes: A late invite hits your inbox or a new boy toy has requested you to be his plus one — either way, you're suddenly in need of an ugly Christmas sweater last minute. Don't fret — it's all about keeping grace under pressure. With Christmas on the horizon, you'll need to do some necessary prepping and be ready and armed with your trusty ugly Christmas sweater when time calls. It's always better to be safe than sorry, right?
Emergency online shopping is the solution here. Within the click of a button, you'll be well on your way to rocking the rave-worthy knit of the evening. Painless yet productive.
1. ASOS
Boohoo Happy Holidays Ya Filthy Animal Sweater, $27, ASOS
Who knew one simple movie in 1992 would forever revolutionize the ugly Christmas sweater? Home Alone fans rejoice: you can wear a slice of cinematic history this holiday season with the iconic "Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animal" (gun firing not necessary).
Currently, ASOS is offering free holiday delivery before 7 p.m. on Dec 15 — the catch: order minimum is $40. Need your sweater ASAP? Upgrade to 2-day shipping for $12.
2. Forever 21
Forever 21 Holiday Graphic Sweater, $25, forever21.com
The number of times Forever 21 has saved me sartorially is infinite. That time I needed a toga-inspired frock for a 10th grade performance of Julius Caesar? Naturally, Forever 21 rescued me — and there's no doubt they would be my shining knight in armor again when it comes to last minute ugly Christmas sweaters. Convenient, affordable, and without a doubt kitschy, Forever 21 is stocked plenty with the right party knits.
Forever 21 is currently offering free shipping online with an option for next-day delivery if order is placed before 11 a.m. PST.
3. Missguided
Missguided Merry Pugmas Jumper, $34, missguidedus.com
Goodbye traditional fair isle patterns and reindeer — what about pugs to ring in the Christmas spirit? Canine devotees will be relieved to know there are a multitude of pup-themed ugly Christmas sweaters on the web — and they are all the definition of adorable.
Get your gear early with Missguided's half-price holiday express shipping: For $7.50, your order will arrive in up to three business days.
4. Nordstrom
Derek Heart Light-Up Reindeer Christmas Sweater, $42, Nordstrom
Say yes to flashy sweaters — after all, what other time of the year would you get away with it? Certainly not a casual April Tuesday that's for sure. This reindeer sweater is especially a Christmas must-have thanks to its light-up nose. Dazzling has never looked better.
Nordstrom is full of shipping opportunities — get free delivery up until Christmas Eve with the option for 2-business day shipping.
5. H&M
H&M Jacquard Knit Sweater, $35, H&M
Play it conventional and chic with a jacquard print at your next ugly Christmas sweater party. If it's your first foray into wacky holiday knits, you might want to keep it on the safe side this time around.
Meanwhile at H&M, receive free shipping until Dec 15.
6. Boohoo
Boohoo Isobel Christmas Tree Jumper, $26, boohoo.com
Wintry animals, snowflakes, Naughty Or Nice — what's next on the holiday aesthetic? Christmas trees, of course. And if you dare: spritz on a pine-scented perfume just because.
Boohoo offers express delivery for $15 a pop.
7. Etsy
1-800 Hotline Bling Christmas Sweater, $25, Etsy
You all knew this was coming. 2015 is the year of Hotline Bling — so pay your respects to the one and only Drake with a holiday-edition of the ridiculously catchy tune.
Because Etsy's shipping policies depend on the vendor, it's best you contact the seller first so both of you can negotiate a date that works for both.
Happy shopping! May you find the ugly Christmas sweater of your dreams.
Images: Courtesy Brands