Life

What Being On Top Really Feels Like For Women

by Laken Howard

If you like to show off between the sheets, chances are that you're a big fan of the cowgirl position. But what does girl-on-top sex feel like? The 2015 Millennial Condoms Sex Survey found that women ranked cowgirl as their third-favorite position, behind missionary sex and doggy-style, so clearly something about it feels straight-up amazing.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: The best thing about sex is that no two sessions are identical. There are so many different positions to experiment with, kinks and fetishes to explore, and toys to bring into the bedroom that it's basically impossible to run out of "good sex." Sure, you can get stuck in a rut, but there are always ways to spice things up.

When it comes to cowgirl, I know that a lot of women love it because of the sense of control it gives them: They can set the pace and decide how deep they want penetration to go, so it's easier for many women to get off when they're on top. But because of the nature of sex and human anatomy, what feels good for one person might not for another. Everyone has different needs in bed, and sometimes certain positions just don't work the way we hoped they would.

Bustle asked seven women what it really feels like for them when they're in the cowgirl position, and their answers are further proof that every vagina is unique, and that everyone has different sexual preferences — which, IMHO, is a very, very good thing, because it keeps life interesting.

1. Zoe, 28

"I love it, but sometimes I can feel insecure about whether he's enjoying it as much as I am. Also it gets tiring after a while, but for the most part it's a really hot position with a really great view for both of you."

2. Betsy, 33

"I kind of don't feel anything, but I don't ever really feel anything when I'm on top — I don't get much vaginal sensation when I'm on top. Nothing special goes through my mind; since I can't feel much, I usually just start thinking about my life, like bills I need to pay or work problems (bleak, I know)."

3. Julia, 28

"It's only my favorite position! It's the easiest way for me to come, because I can go at my pace and touch my clit at the same time. Works every time. The only thing I don't like about it is that I can feel farther away from my partner than in missionary — but coming is worth it! (Plus, that's why he has hands.)"

4. Blair, 22

"I like being on top occasionally, but it does get pretty tiring after a while. It feels the best for me if I am leaning down against my partner's chest and moving more slowly as opposed to just bouncing on top. I prefer the feeling you get from the angle of missionary, but being on top still feels good. It's nice to control the pace, but it's irritating when my hair inevitably gets in the way and turns into a tangled mess."

5. Tess, 24

"For me, girl-on-top is pretty underwhelming. If my partner rubs my clit while I'm on top, I can usually get off, but I often find it difficult to position myself so he has easy access; usually we're chest-to-chest so my clit is out of reach. It's a good position to change things up and give him a break from doing all the work, but it doesn't feel extra special to me."

6. Jamie, 21

"Cowgirl is my absolute favorite! I love to show off in bed, so for me, being on top is ideal. My BF is pretty well-endowed, so I like to be on top so I can be in charge of how deep he goes. Because I can choose how I want to grind on him, the sensations can be super varied, without having to change positions."

7. Courtney, 23

"Being on top feels just like any other position for me, with the added bonus of my partner getting a great view. The penetration itself doesn't necessarily feel any different, but there is a bit more friction because my pelvis is so close to his. Doggy is still my favorite, but cowgirl is definitely in my top three favorite classic positions."

Images: Andrew Zaeh/Bustle; Giphy (7)