Books

What A Millennial 'Harry Potter' Would Look Like

by Emma Lord

Every generation has that one huge pop culture phenomenon that shaped them, and for Millennials, it was undoubtedly The Boy Who Lived. And now Distractify is paying homage to him by doing what our generation does best: repurposing the eff out of it by reimagining the series as Harry Potter written for Millennials.

While we've already imagined what it would be like if Harry Potter took place in 2015 (Wi-Fi connectivity charms FTW), this series facelift takes it to the next level. Distractify has taken every single one of the seven books that guided you through the emotionally fraught trials of teenage angst-hood and molded them to mirror the adult you eventually become. (I'm using the term "adult" loosely, though, seeing as I just dropped several Cheez-Its on the floor, picked them up, and ate them in full view of several coworkers who did not bat an eye.) In any case, if you found it hard to connect to the teenage boy wizard whose prophesied destiny was to kill a madman, never fear — grown up Harry just got hella relatable. YOU THOUGHT DEMENTORS AND HORCRUXES WERE BAD?! Sit down, son. It's time to get learnt about the #MuggleStruggle:

When Wizard Tinder Betrays You

Be careful with your right swipes — only the true heir can ~Slytherin~ to your Chamber of Secrets.

When You Get Wizard Turnt

Butterbeer is for the WEAK.

When You're Too Lazy To Apparate Off The Couch

If James and Lily had made a Seamless delivery driver their Secret Keeper like a normal person, none of this sh*t would have gone down in the first place. #JustSaying.

When The Debt-mentors Won't Get Off Your Back

Accio lottery ticket? (Help.)

To see the rest of Distractify's hilarious reimagined covers, check out If Harry Potter Were Made For Millennials. DOING THE IMPORTANT WORK.

Images: Courtesy of Distractify