Entertainment

The Royal Baby Has A Wikipedia Page. What?!

by Dale Neuringer

So... maybe I'm behind on the news (even though I'm not — celebrity gossip is literally my job), but why does the royal baby already have a Wikipedia page? I mean, it's actually not been born yet. We don't even have a gender to go on. What on earth is wiki-worthy about this fetus?

On the site, it's already being called "the world's most famous baby," which leads me to point out that it isn't a baby yet. It's a floaty, not-quite-full-grown thing inside Kate Middleton right now, so it's pretty weird that we're already putting it on Wikipedia and becoming obsessed with it. Even North West didn't have a prenatal Wikipedia page (or a post-natal page for that matter... #KardashianFail), and little North is basically American royalty, right?

There have been moments on this royal pregnancy journey when the sane members of society wondered: Are we going too far with our baby obsession? Where is the line drawn? Well, for the record, the line is solidly drawn at a fricking Wikipedia page before there is an actual baby, which is a bad sign for baby royal.

The royal family are very good at staying out of the public eye when they don't want to, so the worry is that this baby craze will built to a frenzy, and then we'll have a real baby but no information or photos to feed the chaos. Then what will happen? Will the world come crumbling down around our ears? Probably. Because what on earth will we do without a wrinkly mini-WIlliam to stalk? WHERE WILL WE GET OUR COMMEMORATIVE PLATES? So, so many questions.