The Sex Act Everyone's Talking About

Here's the honest truth: I had no idea what pegging actually is until pretty recently; what's worse, I thought I knew what it was, but I was sorely mistaken (pun not intended). To really give you a sense of how far off base I was on this particular sexual act, the following is based on an actual conversation:

Friend: Have you ever pegged?Me: Sure, haven’t you?Friend: Um, no. Wait, have you really?Me: Of course I have. And what do you mean you haven’t?Friend: Do you even know what pegging is?Me: It’s just sex, right?Friend: [Uncontrollable laughter]

Bottom line: I thought pegging was just your run-of-the-mill penis in vagina sex. Call me naive, but hey, it sounds like it, doesn’t it?

I could not have been more wrong, obviously. And after this very real, very mind-blowing conversation about what pegging actually is, I began to research more about it, including of course how to actually do it. What I uncovered is that this sexual practice is not only very much on the rise in popularity (yep, a lot of people are giving this a go!), but that there are many, many myths that surround it. Not just myths about sex, but specifically about pegging. Because remember, pegging is not just sex. (I'm just reminding myself.)

Here are the five biggest myths about it that exist.

1. It's Going To Hurt A Lot

When it comes to actually going through with said pegging, this is the biggest deterrent. It's pretty understandable, especially this is your first time. Don't let the jitters run too rampant, according to several subjects, and much like most things in life, the pain is far worse in your mind. Think about when you lost your virginity (gals, I'm talking to you here): Sure, it wasn't, well, ideal at first but you go slow and eventually get over that hump in a big way (pun not intended). Speaking of which, the secret to minimizing discomfort as much as possible is likely the same thing you relied on then: lube, lube,, and more lube. Especially since the natural lubricants are lacking in this particularly orifice.

2. The Person Actually Doing The Pegging Doesn't Receive Pleasure

You know how role playing can be a huge turn on? It shouldn't be any different here. For both parties involved, pegging can be pretty hot: the woman gets to dominate, and the guy is at her mercy. Not to mention, the gal will likely also receive a good amount of physical stimulation from the strap on itself — there is a harness involved, after all.

3. If A Girl Likes Pegging, It Means She's A Lesbian

And then there are the taboos around pegging that stem from homophobia. Sure, historically a woman putting on a strap-on could often elude to sexual intercourse with another woman — and that's still true. But that doesn't mean it's the only truth. Like I mentioned, pegging is on the rise in popular culture, even Broad City incorporated into an episode. A woman using a strap-on in heterosexual sex is changing how her and her partner are getting pleasure, it's not changing their sexual orientation.

4. If A Guy Likes Being Pegged, It Means He's Gay

Do you remember Stifler from American Pie? Do you also remember the intense pleasure he felt when that nurse milked his prostate? This may be a bad example, granted 1) that's a movie and 2) that scene is a little, well, yeah — but the point is this: pegging your boyfriend does not mean he's gay. In fact, guys can receive such mind-blowing pleasure via the back door, it even has a name: The P-spot. (P = prostate). So what this really means he's comfortable with his sexuality, up for trying new things, and enjoys really, really good orgasms.

5. All Strap-Ons Are Created Equal

Just like this doesn't apply to condoms, it certainly does not apply here. In fact, what strap on you go with has direct correlation with how advanced you are at this practice. That said, beginners may want to opt for a smaller size, while the more advanced, well, there's a whole plethora of advanced options for you too. Don't know where to start? The people who work in sex shops are very nice, and not at all judgmental. Just lay it out there, for the sake of good pegging.

Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our video on sex positions for small penises:

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